SEPTEMBER 2, 2009 -- CHICAGO 4, MINNESOTA 2

Probably the worst lost of the season. One of those games where you look back on your season after it's over and you put a big red circle around this game. The White Sox were reeling. They had lost five straight and had just traded two of their veterans, apparently waving a white flag on their season. Joe Nathan had two outs, nobody on base, and an 0-2 count on Gordon Beckham, with the Twins leading 2-0. Beckham worked the count full, plastered a fastball into the left field seats, and Paul Konerko would do just about the same exact thing in the very next at-bat to tie the game. Two walks later would prompt The Brain to inexplicably take Nathan out of the game in favor of Matt Guerrier. Such a dick-head move by Ron Gardenhire, yet so predictable. What's better, Guerrier sucks so much that he grooves an 0-2 curveball down the heart of the plate to Alexei Ramirez, who pasted it to left to drive home the game winning run. A wild pitch during the next at-bat would complete the Matt Guerrier Special, which is extra special in this case because Guerrier's stats are completely clean according to the boxscore. That's what makes Gardenhire's move that much more of a prick move -- you let Matt Guerrier allow runs that go on Joe Nathan's ERA while Guerrier gets off scot-free. And Joe Nathan's your best pitcher -- I don't care if he walked three batters in a row, you don't replace your best reliever for Matt Guerrier with guys on base. Joe Nathan has earned the right to get out of his own mess. But, since Ron Gardenhire (rightly) let Joe Nathan pitch 53 pitches in Kansas City like three weeks ago, he's been extra cautious with his closer, and that in turn has led to this game slipping through his fingers.


Mike Redmond has to be commended for putting his two cents into losing the game for the Twins. On Ramirez's game-winner, Denard Span's throw to home beat pinch-runner DeWayne Wise by ten feet, but the old, craggly Redmond couldn't field the one-hopper, or much less block the plate, and allowed Wise to score. Then on Guerrier's wild pitch, Redmond put forth a quasi-effort, the sort of effort that screams "well I'm damn near forty and these knees are barkin' dogs right about now, but I still get the respect of the manager and the fans, so they won't really mind because Guerrier sucks anyways." Mike Redmond looks old on the field and more importantly he plays old. The talent that he has in terms of athleticism left him a few years ago, and the only value he has anymore is that of a mentor. Sadly, you don't pay mentors millions of dollars a year, or at least you shouldn't (try telling that to a team that pays Nick Punto $4 million dollars more than what he's worth). Jose Morales' pinch hit single in the bottom of the ninth raised his average to a mere .362, but hey -- don't think for a second that he's better than Mike Redmond. No sirree Bob.


A deflating loss like this not only drops them a critical game in the standings, but it takes the momentum that they had built over the past two weeks and throws that out the window. Now they embark on a seven-game road trip against Cleveland and Toronto, two second-division ballclubs, but that surely doesn't mean it's going to be easy for the Twins. Case in point Friday's starter for Cleveland, southpaw Jeremy Sowers, who throughout his career has posted some ugly numbers (5.07 career ERA) but has somehow been able to be very stingy against the Twins (3.35 ERA in five starts, including a complete-game shutout). And don't get me started on the struggles the Twins have had against the Blue Jays -- they've amazingly lost twelve of their last thirteen games against Toronto, and haven't won north of the border since April 2006. Most importantly, the 2009 Twins team has continued to be an enigma, and their two-week stretch of near-brilliance may just as easily be backed up by two weeks of gut-wrenching futility.

Photos: AP/Ann Heisenfelt

AUGUST 30, 2009 -- MINNESOTA 5, TEXAS 3

A perfect example of the Twins winning a game in spite of their manager, Ron Gardenhire, whose moves in the bottom of the eighth inning are head-scratching mystifiers if you ask this fan. To make matters worse, Dick Bremer pointed to "shrewd managing" as a reason why the Twins were able to come back against the Rangers; it's unfortunately paradoxical and counter-productive when one idiot heaps praise on a fellow idiot. Let's examine this half-inning to see how the Twins were shockingly able to come back: after Justin Morneau walked and Jason Kubel singled against C.J. Wilson, Michael Cuddyer came up to the plate with one goal in mind: to strike out. Some baseball people would have had Cuddyer bunt, but I'm fine with what happened. In those situations, Cuddyer has to strike out, because that is apparently what he's paid to do. No problem there. Then Brendan Harris singles to left to tie the game, and outfielder Nelson Cruz's error allows runners to move to second and third with one out. So far, so good for Ron Gardenhire -- he hasn't done jackshit, and the team has tied the game and is on the verge of taking the lead. Then he continues to do nothing, and inexplicably he lets Mike Redmond hit. Here's a guy who, if it weren't for Nick Punto and Alexi Casilla also being on the team, would be by far the worst hitter on your team, who hits the ball to the right side of the field because he can't catch up to anything at this point in his career and is perpetually behind the baseball. Gardenhire had some moves on the bench to make: Jose Morales, he of the Joe Mauer-esque batting average, Orlando Cabrera, and Seldom Young -- all three of those players are far superior hitters to Redmond. But Gardy goes with Redmond, who bounces it to first, and pinch-runner Carlos Gomez is only able to score because of a bad throw home. Gardenhire again lucks out, does nothing and gets the advantageous bounce to take the lead.

Now it's Nick Punto's turn, and Bremer lauded Gardenhire's ploy to bunt Punto here. As if everybody else in the building didn't also think that Punto just *might* bunt. Dude, have you seen Nick Punto swing the bat this season? It's kind of like watching Elaine Benes dance -- he's got these little kicks and herky-jerky movements that's very hard to watch most of the time. Yeah, like you're going to have Nick Punto try to swing away to get the run home. The bunt is a decent one, and Wilson's throw home was again errant, allowing the run to score, and Bremer takes that opportunity to praise both morons, Gardenhire and Punto, for teaming together to score another run. As if Gardy was done making moronic managerial moves; in the middle of the next at-bat, on a 1-1 pitch, Gardenhire pinch-runs Redmond at second base in favor of Orlando Cabrera? Whaaaaaat???!!! You'd pinch-run Redmond in the middle of an at-bat but you'd think that he could get the job done at the plate? What the hell are you thinking, Gardenhire? And to make matters worse, instead of putting Jose Morales behind the plate for the ninth, he loses his DH and has Mauer catch the ninth. Ladies and gentlemen, meet the Master of Logic, Ron Gardenhire. Oh, and as a side note, the Twins are unable to extend their lead because Alexi Casilla, batting .198 and second in the lineup again, failed to get a two-out hit. Hmm. I wouldn't have expected that.

So Sunday's game was a perfect example of the Twins winning despite their manager's best efforts to lose ballgames. Not that this should be necessarily new to Twins fans, as Gardy has done this ever since he took over the managerial reins in 2002. Unfortunately for the Twins, Gardenhire's poor managing did constitute enough to lose the season for the Twins in 2008, and if they want to make the playoffs this year, it's going to be the players that are going to have to rise up and win in spite of Gardenhire's best Pete Rose imitations. By the way, the Tigers' dramatic 4-3 win against Tampa Bay again prevented the Twins from moving up on Detroit.

Photos: (1) AP/Tom Olmscheid; (2) Getty Images/G. Newman Lawrence

AUGUST 9, 2009 -- DETROIT 8, MINNESOTA 7

The Twins make a valiant comeback after they let the Tigers take control of the game in which they had an early 3-0 lead, but it's all for naught once Matt Guerrier serves it up in the eighth, providing Twins fans of a glimpse of the 2008 Matty Guerrier that we know and love. The classic Matt Guerrier Special came back to haunt the Twins in the eighth, where Guerrier not only gave up the lead to the Tigers, but like all classic MGSes, he gave up the critical insurance run as well that ended up to be the deciding run in the game. In all the Twins pitching staff gave up fifteen hits, which is simply incredible -- it was the fifth time in nine games that the staff had surrendered that many hits in a game. Not surprisingly, the Twins have lost all five of those games. Tom Kelly used to say that the three most important facets of the game of baseball were pitching, pitching, and pitching, and never is that more true than with the 2009 Twins. They're hitting the cover off the ball right now, smacking three long home runs in Sunday's game and collecting fourteen hits of their own. If only they could get some consistent pitching, they'd be running away with the division and be in a position to actually compete with the elite of the American League. But alas, Sunday's loss drops them 5 1/2 games behind the front-running Tigers, and more importantly the Twins remain three games below the .500 mark.


Mike Redmond surprisingly got three hits for the Twins today. Perhaps Jarrod Washburn wasn't as "tough" an assignment for a backup player, which is a reference to Redmond's curious statements following Thursday's loss to Cleveland, where Redmond basically hinted that he shouldn't have been in the lineup facing Fausto Carmona. It's so bad that even the talent-free Redmond knows he's got nothing left in the tank, but he doinked three hits on Sunday and helped produce some runs. But his actual value for the Twins has continuously diminished, and that was emphasized on Sunday, when Ron Gardenhire was forced to remove Redmond from the game in the eighth inning for a pinch runner. Of course, when Gardenhire does that, that means that Joe Mauer must move from the DH spot to the catcher's position, which means that the pitcher must now assume the vacant DH spot in the batting order. By needing to pinch-hit for the .176-hitting Alexi Casilla in the same inning, Gardenhire effectively exhausted his bench in that one inning, and it nearly made for an embarrassing situation in the ninth inning. The pitcher's spot was sixth in the batting order for the Twins in the ninth, and that meant that if they were to mount a rally against Fernando Rodney, the Twins would have had no recourse but to send a pitcher to the plate with the game on the line (and no, I'm not using that as a euphemism for Nick Punto -- an actual pitcher (which, by the way, probably would be a better opportunity to score than if Punto had been at the plate)). It goes to show how having guys like Redmond and Casilla (who you're going to replace late in close ballgames anyway because they suck in more than one way) on the team absolutely cripples your roster. Again, there's a guy down in Triple-A who has a major-league batting average this season residing in Joe Mauer-land who's young, energetic, and isn't any more of a defensive liability than the elder statesman Redmond is. Why the Twins refuse to make the obvious talent upgrade is beyond me and I'm sure it continues to confuse Twins fans elsewhere. I would have loved to see Joe Nathan taking hacks at Fernando Rodney with the tying run on base with two out in the ninth inning -- actually I would have more enjoyed the look that Ron Gardenhire would have had on his face at that point. But, the patheticness of Seldom Young made that an impossibility when he took a brutal quasi-swing at Rodney's first pitch and tapped weakly to third base to end the ballgame.


The Twins have an offday Monday and then travel home to open a six-game homestand against the AL Central's two bottom feeders, the Kansas City Royals and the Cleveland Indians. Once again the Twins will luck out and not have to face Zach Greinke in that Royals series, but the real story will be that the Twins will have to have good starting pitching down the stretch if they want a sniff at the divisional title. It doesn't matter who you're playing -- the Yankees or the Royals -- if you can't pitch, like the Twins haven't lately, you simply won't win ballgames. The Twins aren't even sure who's going to make the Thursday afternoon game at this point, and Francisco Liriano is tentatively penciled in to make Tuesday's start. My bet is that Brian Douchebag makes one of those starts, and something tells me that Ron Gardenhire will go ahead and let Liriano make another start. It sure as hell doesn't inspire a whole lot of confidence when you are unclear who's going to be pitching the majority of the innings in an upcoming series. Especially when you consider yourself a playoff "contender."

AUGUST 6, 2009 -- CLEVELAND 2, MINNESOTA 1

Go figure. The Twins' biggest problem in the last two weeks (and the entire year, really) has been consistently ineffective pitching. Their loss on Thursday had absolutely nothing to do with pitching and had everything to do with an absence of clutch hitting. The Twins went 0 for 13 with runners in scoring position, this against an Indian ballclub which boasts of the worst pitching staff in the American League. Fausto Carmona was absolutely destroyed the last time the Twins faced him in early June, as he didn't last more than two innings. Here's a guy who was such a mess that he was sent down to Rookie ball to try to figure things out. Even with his six inning, one-run performance on Thursday, Carmona's ERA sits at a devilish 6.66, and the Twins were unable to get anything more than one measly run against Carmona and company. I believe this loss to be somewhat of a forboding defeat. Though previous to this game I had serious doubts whether they could win the division, I think after Thursday's debacle that they're done. I know it's August, but these are the kind of games that made me think of 2005 and 2007 -- in that it seems that if the Twins hit and put 5-6 runs on the board, their pitching fails them and they lose, and the games which their pitchers give up one or two or three runs, their offense fails them and they lose. I know it's just one game, but it was the kind of game that sort of tells a larger story -- and this story doesn't end with the Twins making the playoffs.

It's hard to pin the blame on one hitter when the team went hitless in thirteen at-bats with runners in scoring position, and nobody had an RBI for that matter (the lone run scored on a wild pitch). The top of the second was perhaps the most pitiful of the scoring chances that the Twins squandered, and guess who's to blame there -- no, you didn't say the bottom of the lineup, did you? After a Michael Cuddyer walk and a Joe Crede double put runners on second and third with nobody out, it was up to Mike Redmond and Alexi Casilla to get those runners home. That previous sentence would make it seem like those players have done that sort of thing in the past, which I know is purely asinine logic, considering the actual talent those players don't possess. Redmond hit a soft liner to the second baseman, pathetically wasting the first chance the Twins had. Now it's Alexi Casilla's turn. This guy's had one -- count it, ONE -- hit this season of any circumstance, against the Mariners in the opening series of the year. That clutch hit has been supremely dwarfed in a gigantic shadow of mental mistakes, defensive miscues, infield pop-ups, strikeouts -- consistent failure at the plate. Against Carmona, there wasn't any doubt that Casilla would not get the job done, and sure as shit, he strikes out, and after Denard Span tapped back to the pitcher, the Twins had wasted a golden opportunity to break through.

The rest of the game featured chances in which the Twins' best hitters, Justin Morneau and Joe Mauer and Jason Kubel, could not get clutch two-out hitting, which is a hallmark of good clubs. Considering the opponent that the Twins played, the series they just completed against the Indians was probably the worst series of the season for the Twins, especially because they now head to Detroit with zero momentum. The upcoming series against the Tigers might be a make-or-break series. Four and a half games behind the Tigers already, the Twins could be as much as seven and a half back before the weekend is up. And they'll have to face two of the Tigers' top three pitchers, Justin Verlander and Jarrod Washburn, which amplifies the importance of Friday's game, in which the Twins will face the struggling Armando Galarraga, who has never beaten the Twins in five career decisions. If the Twins want to have a chance at winning the division, they need to win this series, but what evidence is there to make that a reasonable thing to ask of this ballclub? This would be a perfect time for Ron Gardenhire to take a closed-door meeting with his ballclub and lay down some parameters -- tell his team that certain play will not be tolerated and that his players would get benched for making mental mistakes. Oh wait, that just happened two weeks ago, and it turned out those threats turned out empty and the effectiveness of said meeting turned out to be marginal and the respect for the manager turned out to be superficial. Well, it was worth a try.

JULY 20, 2009 -- OAKLAND 14, MINNESOTA 13

Buckle up, folks. This one's going to be a long one.

Many people might come here and expect a nice long rant on how home plate umpire Mike Muchlinski blew the call at home to end the game, calling out Michael Cuddyer trying to score from second base on a wild pitch. And let's get it straight -- Cuddyer was very safe; it really wasn't close at all. Muchlinski's horrible call cannot go unnoticed, as it probably is one of the worst, most gutless calls I've ever seen in my life. But the fact remains is this -- to cry over a bad call in the ninth inning in a game in which the Twins led by ten freaking runs is not the correct emotion to cling to. This was a game so classically Gardenhire-esque and so pathetic and yet so predictable that Muchlinski probably made the right call. The Twins had no business even being close in this game. They were as far from deserving to win on Monday as any team in the history of major league baseball. This is the real Twins, folks. These players and this manager -- these pathetic excuses for baseball people are what we stress out over for six months of the year.

OK -- you don't call yourself a competitive team -- no, scratch that; you don't call yourself a major-league team if you're losing games in which you were leading the second worst team in the American League by TEN runs. This is a mockery of the game to lose a game like this. A mockery of the game. The sad part about it is that a lot of people will forget how pathetic the Twins actually were and remember only Muchlinski's bonehead call. We need not to forget about such games -- that's Ron Gardenhire's awesome idea, to just forget about it and move on. No -- we need to examine how games like this get out of hand so it never, EVER happens again. Ron Gardenhire needs to look at his own managerial style and see how this game was lost well before it even began. I'm sorry -- in a game in which you have a ten run lead and you lose, it's not all on the players. A lot of the blame must be thrown on the manager here, and this was one of the worst managed games I've ever been a witness to. Quite often here at the MTRC, I tend to overplay my hatred for Ron Gardenhire and I might be a little harsh on him at times. But it's these kind of performances that just reaffirm Gardenhire's status as truly one of the worst in-game managers in the game. It's absolutely cuckoo to me how this man can sleep at night.

Gardenhire's first folly: deciding (whenever it was) that his staff ace, sinkerballer Nick Blackburn should get nine days between starts, giving some bullshit excuse like "he's worked a lot of innings in the first half of the season." That's ridiculous right off the bat, because Blackburn's been your ace in the season and you ride your best pitcher, not give him nine days off and throw off his rythym. More importantly, it doesn't take a lifelong baseball fan to know that nine days between starts for a sinkerball pitcher would tend to make Blackburn a little too strong for his start on Monday, thereby putting too much force on the sinkerball and straightening it out. I was curious why Blackburn was skipped on Friday when he should have started, and to hear that Blackburn's workload was perhaps a little "taxing" in the first half of the season was pure Gardenhire blather that makes little to no logical sense. Not surprisingly, Blackburn put forth his worst performance of the season, giving up thirteen hits and seven runs in five innings of work. But when you get a week and a half between starts, that's only going to screw with the winning rythym he had set in the first half. Good one, Gardy.

Then the bullpen. I had to do a double take last night when I heard Ron Gardenhire's post-game comments (usually I don't, but I had to see what he was going to say after this one). I don't have the exact quote, but Gardenhire said something like, "You're used to seeing this happen to the other team and not ours," referring to a bullpen meltdown. Ah--whaaaaat? Does the year 2008 mean anything to you? Remember when you brought Matt Guerrier in every freaking game to blow leads and lose games down the stretch? Apparently this has all been taken care of thanks to Ron Gardenhire's patented GARDY 2K8 Amnesia Therapy, and it's another reason why forgetting about what didn't work at one time is a terrible philosophy not only to manage a baseball team but life in general. It's one thing that Ron Gardenhire's a terrible manager, but it's even worse when he goes Last Year at Marienbad on us all. Good managers have the ability to adapt, and acknowledge what didn't work once and try a different approach. Monday's game and his bullpen management was predictably bad, but I still can't figure out the logic behind any of it.

1) He brings in Brian Douchebag in the sixth inning. Douchebag was apparently Gardenhire's bridge from Blackburn to the eighth inning, which makes zero sense considering Duensing had pitched in Sunday's game (and took the loss). Douchebag's sixth inning was a struggle, as he allowed the first two batters to reach before being bailed out by a double-play ball. You'd think after Douchebag struggled so mightily in the sixth inning that Ron Gardenhire would come to his senses. Why he didn't go to R.A. Dickey in the sixth and the seventh is beyond me; Dickey had pitched Sunday too, but only threw six pitches, and hadn't pitched for eight days prior to that. Besides, he's the staff junkballer and you've boasted the fact that Dickey can give you four innings each night. But there was Douchebag on the mound for the seventh, and the same scenario unfolded: this time the first three batters reached, and then Ron Gardenhire waddled out to the mound to make a pitching change.

2) We were all waiting in steep anticipation for the Bobby Keppel Meltdown. What we were waiting for is the most pathetic opportunity for that to happen, and when Keppel was called on to "extinguish" the situation on Monday, I knew that Keppel was giving up the lead like nothing else in the world. If I were in Las Vegas, I would have made a killing on that, because that is the perfect situation for this career 7+ ERA wash-up never-even-has-been to finally implode. Why this guy was even called up from the minors when stud prospects like Anthony Slama and Rob Delaney continue to post impressive numbers still confuses me. Of course, with Ron Gardenhire, all you have to give him is two or three good outings out of the bullpen and you are then called on to blow games on a regular basis, and after Monday, we'll probably get to see a few more Bobby Keppel Meltdowns before that whole experiment officially goes kaput. It was pretty quick with Keppel -- bloop double, walk, and game-tying grand slam -- and in came Jose Mijares to give up the game-winning home run on the first pitch he threw to Jack Cust.

3) Then there's the situation in the top of the eighth inning. Joe Mauer had been given the night off, apparently because he's been struggling of late, but now with the Twins behind on the scoreboard, now Ron Gardenhire had the luxury of having the best hitter in the American League on his bench, and he could use him in a number of favorable situations. Brendan Harris led off the eighth with a single off reliever Brad Ziegler, and Mike Redmond strode to the plate. I figured that Gardenhire was going to save Mauer for the ninth inning or, if Redmond can at least move Harris to second base, pinch hit in the eighth inning for Alexi Casilla. Gardenhire had already dug himself a hole when he used Nick Punto in the #2 hole, and with Casilla also playing, the Twins had two sore thumbs in the batting order, but at least they had their ace in the hole in Joe Mauer (Casilla and Punto, by the way, went a combined 0 for 8, with two strikeouts and five pop-ups -- again, how long does it take Mark Grudzielanek to get into game shape?). Redmond's bunt attempts (he hadn't sacrificed in over three years, by the way) were for naught, and you had the sneak feeling that Redmond better strike out, because if he puts the ball in play, he's going to hit into a double play. Well, that's exactly what happened. With two out and nobody on base, up strode Joe Mauer to pinch hit for Casilla. This one I still can't fathom the logic behind. What are you doing, Ron Gardenhire? In essence, he wastes Mauer -- what, does he think he's going to hit a home run? Compounded on that was the fact that Mauer took over for Redmond behind the plate in the bottom of the eighth. So instead of pinch hitting Mauer for Redmond -- which is the logical move if you're planning on putting Mauer at catcher anyway -- Gardenhire uses his best hitter in a meaningless spot and lets Mike Redmond take their team out of the inning a batter before. With two out and nobody on, I'd might as well let Alexi Casilla make the third out of that inning and save Mauer for the ninth, because you have Nick Punto in the #2 hole that you need a pinch hitter for, too. As it turned out, Gardenhire had to use Brian Buscher, his other pinch-hitting option, at third to take over Redmond's spot in the lineup, and Punto had to hit in the ninth. Basically, with that beyond-stupid move, Gardenhire made three outs with one move -- Redmond made two outs when he should have been pinch-hit for, and Punto struck out because Gardenhire pinch hit Mauer in the wrong place and had to waste his other pinch-hitting option for defense. Absolutely demented managing.

Well, I'm done with this one. For all those out there who still think this team is competitive and can win this division, I hope you can look at this game and see who the real Minnesota Twins are. And the fact is, this has been the team all along. They've been masquerading as a .500 club up to this point, and all it takes is one West Coast classic like this one to prove to everyone that the Twins aren't going anywhere this season and as long as Ron Gardenhire manages this bunch of clowns, they'll never do anything.

JULY 17, 2009 -- Reader Mail #1

Howdy, folks, and I am proud to present the first segment of Reader's Mail here at the MTRC. I got plenty of e-mails posing questions on a broad variety of subjects, so what I decided is that this segment is just one of many that will be posted here when things are slow around the Center. I appreciate all the e-mails that I did receive and I encourage those to keep them coming. Here's just a sampling of the stuff that I got, and remember -- if your question was not answered here, it will most likely be featured in a future installment of Reader's Mail.


From Dave in St. Peter --

Hey Eisenhower, I'm wondering what you think about Rick Anderson. I know that you're very critical of Ron Gardenhire and I'll be honest -- I like the guy. I can see where you're coming from though. But what's your take on Rick Anderson?


Thanks Dave for the good question. For me, Rick Anderson and Ron Gardenhire are ideal bedfellows, as their philosophies go hand in hand. It's kind of like the old question of what came first, the chicken or the egg, with these two numbskulls. Is it Anderson that initiated the 100-pitch limit (not pitch count, as it's as strict as it can be), or was that Gardenhire all along? What can be said about both of these guys is that they failed so pathetically in their own playing careers -- both getting cups of coffee for the Mets in the early to mid-'80s -- that they really can't impart any real experience to their players. More often than not, they're running on book knowledge of the game. Their coaching philosophies are very similar to Tony LaRussa and Dave Duncan, who really revolutionized the game with their greater usage of a bullpen and not stretching their starters out too long. Hey, if you look at the numbers that the pitching staff has put up in the past, it would be easy to lionize Anderson as a successful pitching coach. One rule I have will all the Twins is "What have you done for me lately," and the pitching staff this season has been far from superb. And secondly, Anderson was grateful to have guys like Johan Santana, Brad Radke, and Francisco Liriano (2006 version) on his staff. Those guys didn't really need a whole lot of coaching. But, like Gardenhire, Anderson is a stubborn, unchanging coach who still coaches his pitching staff as if it were 2004. Both coaches need a greater flexibility and a willingness to adapt to current situations.


From Nick in Plymouth --


I was wondering why the Twins insist on keeping catcher Mike Redmond as the second string catcher when a younger, less injury prone catcher, Jose Morales is hitting .343? From what I hear is Mike Redmond is a great guy to have in the clubhouse, but what ever happened letting the best player play for the better of the team? It’s not little league where everyone gets a chance to play.


Great timely question, Nick. It's timely because the Twins, for the fourteen-hundredth time this season, sent down Morales in favor of a third long-man out of the bullpen, Kevin Mulvey. Mulvey was one of the low-level prospects the Twins netted in the disastrous Santana trade, and with him in the bullpen, that means that he joins R.A. Dickey and Bobby Keppel as long-relievers when their real need, a eighth-inning stopper, continues to go unaddressed. And compounding this head-scratching move is the fact that Morales has continued to be ignored by Gardenhire and the regime. You're exactly right, Nick -- Mike Redmond, while being a classy, hard-nosed guy, is way over the hill. He plain can't hit, his defensive skills are average at best, and the pitching staff has struggled when Redmond has caught them. Redmond just doesn't have much left in the tank, but because the Twins owe Redmond money, they'd rather have Morales, a guy who's hit every time he's been called up, languish in Triple-A. And with Joe Mauer on the team, you need to DH Mauer on those days that he doesn't catch, and that means that Redmond is essentially the only catcher on the roster those days. You'd think that doesn't mean a whole lot, but earlier in the season the Twins were screwed when Redmond was unexpectedly thrown out of the game and Mauer had to catch, thereby eliminating the DH for the game and making the pitcher have to hit. You really don't need three long-relievers on any team at any time, so keep Morales on the team as your third catcher (and, in actuality, your second best catcher). It makes zero sense to keep Redmond over Morales at this point, but remember that we're dealing with Ron Gardenhire, who doesn't tend to make a ton of logical decisions concerning his team. All that we can hope is that Mike Redmond retires at the end of the season, because we know that if he wants to play, the Twins will gladly overpay him.


Donna from Sioux Falls, SD says --

Hi Eisenhower! You do a great job with the blog. I was just wondering about how you got your name -- it's very original and I almost wish I could go back and name one of my kids Eisenhower. Are you named after Dwight Eisenhower?


Thanks for the email, Donna. Yes, I was named after our great 34th president and military genius, Dwight David Eisenhower. My parents were lifelong Republicans and my father served in World War II in the European Theater. Though he did not serve directly under Eisenhower's command, he was my father's hero, and when I was born in the mid-'50s, my folks decided to honor him by naming me after him. I will say that I was made fun of when I was younger for the name, and in response I prefered the name Howie for a long time. But in my later years I've embraced the name, and I even extended that gratitude when my first daughter was born. I paid homage to my folks by deciding to name my daughter Reagan, after the newly-sworn in president at that time. And some people still ask me -- if your parents wished to honor Eisenhower, why not name me Dwight? Or David? But I'm glad that they didn't, and I've learned to really love my handle.


From Pete in Richfield --

[In response to my post regarding the Twins calling up Alexi Casilla and sending Matt Tolbert to Triple-A], Casilla isn’t that bad. Tolbert was. Hustle and effort only go so far, then you have to rely on talent, and Casilla has shown by last year’s performance that he has some talent[...]Finally, if Terry Ryan Jr. doesn’t get off his hands and make a deal, the fans may leave in droves in August and September. Billy Smith has done one thing better than any other GM in baseball: NOTHING.


Casilla did have a good year last year, but at the beginning of this season I did predict a crash down to earth. Not in my wildest dreams did I think he'd do this bad, but I figured that 2008 was a fluke and that appears to be the case. It's not too often that a guy goes down to the minors, gets called back up again, and plays worse than he had before being sent down for the first time. After all, the guy was hitting a mere .170 when he was first sent down, but somehow he played even worse the second go-round, and his defensive play is an absolute joke. If I was Bill Smith I would have put Casilla on my Do Not Call List and have him play the rest of the season in the minor leagues to get his act together. Now, as far as a Tolbert vs. Casilla argument goes, I guess I can agree with you, seeing as Casilla at least has had some success at the majors, and Tolbert not only has not played well in the big leagues, but he has been supremely average in the minors as well. He didn't deserve to be in the big leagues in the first place and certainly hasn't earned a spot to stay. And I totally agree with your analysis of Bill Smith, but I wouldn't expect anything drastic from the front-office. The only guy that the Twins have signed as a free-agent in the last five years that has actually panned out is Joe Crede, and has anyone noticed how they're handling that situation? Check out the stipulations of Crede's contract that he signed in the late winter. It's only a $2 million base salary, and he could make as much as $7 million if he reaches a certain amount of at-bats. But Crede's basically a player who plays four to five days a week, and there's absolutely no way that he makes the maximum amount of his deal. I'm not surprised one bit, because we're talking about the cheapest organization in professional sports -- for every hangnail, scratch, flake of dandruff, cough or burp that Crede produces, the Twins immediately bench him "for precautionary measures," but more importantly that means a few extra bucks that the Twins can save. The guy's on pace to hit over 25 homers, but the Twins would rather play Brian Buscher a couple days a week so they can save money on Joe Crede. Ridiculous.


That concludes the first edition of Reader's Mail, and expect more such segments throughout the year and especially during the off-season. I had a blast doing this and I beg of you -- please keep the e-mails coming. Even if you disagree with me -- especially if you disagree with me, in fact -- don't feel afraid to let your comments known.

JULY 1, 2009 -- MINNESOTA 5, KANSAS CITY 1

Another easy win for the Twins against the struggling Royals, who did not look like the team that the Twins faced earlier in the season. Surprisingly, the Twins pulled off a very successful road trip -- one that included stops in three cities, and the Twins won two out of three in every city. Of course, the Twins could have very easily won every single game on the road trip, but considering the Twins early-season patheticness on the road, a 6-3 road trip is something to praise the heavens for. And perhaps the best thing about the trip is that the Twins did it mainly with pitching. Glen Perkins put in a second stellar start in a row on the road, this time buckling down against the Royals and pitching seven solid innings, allowing ten hits but only one run. The offense again did just enough to get a victory, and again the Royal defense helped them out. Alberto Callaspo botched a routine grounder off the bat of Joe Crede to score the second and eventual winning run in the third inning. Michael Cuddyer hit a home run -- not surprisingly a solo home run early in the game. Cuddyer's stats are padded with such production, either amassed early in games when the hits don't mean a whole lot, or late in routs that do not effect the outcome of the game. Cuddyer's parlayed that hitting strategy into a lot of money, a la Torii Hunter, and he was at it again on Wednesday afternoon.

Three Twins had to leave the game due to injury on Wednesday, but really only one of them might be worrisome for the Twins. Mike Redmond had to leave the game in the fifth inning due to getting a foul ball off his hand. No worries there; Redmond's got no gas left in the tank anyway, and Jose Morales is only hitting .360, and you're not losing anything defensively with the youngster in there anyway. Nick Punto had to leave the game (!!!) in the seventh due to a sore back. I just can't contain my glee -- I'm like a schoolgirl flush with emotion whenever I hear that Nick Punto has to leave a game because of an injury. Now I would have preferred to hear that the ribs were sore again, which probably would have led to another disabled-list stay for Superman, but I'm crossing my fingers that the back and the ribs made Punto a no-go at least for a few days. I've said it before and I'll say it again: any day that I can live without seeing, hearing, or hearing about Nick Punto is a good day. It's a damn good day.

Now the one casualty of the Wednesday afternoon victory that might trouble Twins fans was Justin Morneau, who left the game with an injured groin on Wednesday. Not only does Morneau's absence hurt the Twins, but that specific injury does not look promising. Groin injuries aren't the sort of ailments that one day's rest can adequately heal. I've said on this site that both Joe Mauer and Jason Kubel are arguably more valuable to the Twins than Justin Morneau, but the fact is is that you can't go an extended period of time without Morneau and have a legitimate chance of competing. Without Morneau, both Joe Mauer and Jason Kubel are affected because they won't get quite as many fastballs without Morneau sandwiched in between the two. Hopefully Morneau won't be able to go on the disabled list with this injury, but perhaps that's what can explain Morneau's slow month of June. Before hitting home runs in the last three games of the month, he had been struggling for a little bit. Let's hope that Ron Gardenhire was simply taking a precaution by resting Morneau for the last few innings on Thursday and that he'll be ready to go on Friday.

The Nick Punto thing brings up another point: Punto started at shortstop and Matt Tolbert played second base and hit second for the Twins. It's the four-billionth time that Ron Gardenhire has put the .170-hitting Tolbert in the second hole, meaning that a guy hitting .170 was protecting Joe Mauer. Talk about an insane move. And why is Brendan Harris getting a day off? Yes, he's been the regular shortstop for about a month now, but this is the second time in a week and a half that Ron Gardenhire has sat a regular player one day before a scheduled off day. He did it inexplicably with Justin Morneau a few Sundays ago. Especially with the Twins playing a day game on Wednesday, why are we sitting a regular player and substituting a terrible player when there's an off-day the very next day? The game got over around 4:30 Wednesday, and the Twins don't play until 7:00 on Friday; that's essentially two days off. But in his demented head, Ron Gardenhire has to get his regular players an adequate time on the bench during games apparently. It's really not surprising, though; we're talking about a guy who loves to sit the best hitter on the planet on a regular basis.

The Twins now come home for a long home stand starting Friday against the Tigers. Dick Bremer has been overhyping the series as a "mid-season battle for first place," when in reality the only thing that likely will happen is that the Tigers will prove to the Twins that they are starting to put first-place on lockdown. Detroit will end up winning the Central by ten games, mainly because their pitching is far superior to the Twins. The Tigers will send up a rookie, Luke French, in the series opener, but then will counter with Edwin Jackson and Rick Porcello, who have both been outstanding this season. Kevin Slowey will oppose French on Friday night, looking for his eleventh win on the season.

MAY 28, 2009 -- BOSTON 3, MINNESOTA 1

The Twins can't take three out of four against the Red Sox, struggling to get anything off of Boston ace Josh Beckett, and losing 3-1. The lone Twins run came on a Joe Crede bomb to left field, but other than that the Twins rarely threatened against Beckett and the bullpen. The seventh inning was certainly an eventful frame, as both teams saw their catcher and manager being tossed in that inning. It really hurt the Twins, as they were forced to use Joe Mauer behind the plate and lose the designated hitter for the remainder of the game. This probably will now make Ron Gardenhire wary of using both Mike Redmond and Joe Mauer in the same game, and he'll probably resort to just resting Mauer and not using him as a DH. It may also prompt Gardenhire to call up Jose Morales as a third catcher, which I would welcome. What value does Luis Ayala have on this team? Zero, and his days on the roster should be coming to a close, which could make room for a third catcher. In all reality, Redmond has no serviceable talent available anymore, but he's a "clubhouse guy" and "gritty," as Gardenhire would say, and he has a sick aversion of keeping talent-deficient "character" guys on his team (Punto, Tolbert, Redmond, et al).


Anthony Swarzak pitched good enough to win the ballgame for the Twins, pitching into the seventh inning and allowing only three runs. Now I know that young pitchers have a tendancy to do well in their first few starts, before teams have a good knowledge of how the pitcher approaches at-bats and what stuff he has. It's not wise to assume that Swarzak is going to be lights-out all season long. But it is refreshing to see a pitcher on the mound who is confident in his pitches. Swarzak is a pitcher's pitcher, a pitcher and not merely a thrower, who has appeared to be wise beyond his years in his first two starts. Conversely, Glen Perkins looked like a deer in the headlights in his last four or so starts, Francisco Liriano seems to have zero confidence in his ability right now, and Scott Baker doesn't exactly own the mound at this point either. Swarzak's poise is really his number one asset, and I don't think you can remove him from his starting spot until he appears to lose that poise. I reiterate that I believe the best situation for the team is for Liriano to move to the bullpen -- and don't think of it as a demotion to the bullpen, but rather perceive it as having both the team and the pitcher's best interest in mind when making the move. Liriano has devastating stuff when he's on, but he seems to lose that edge rather quickly in his starts. Bottle that lights-out stuff and expose it for an inning or two at a time; it can help the team drastically, because we all know that the middle-relief is the Achilles heel of the franchise. Joe Nathan isn't going to be around forever, either, and Liriano potentially has closer material. Moving Liriano to the 'pen makes logical sense, which probably means that the Twins will never do it.


Here's a Nick Punto update for all you fans. Punto sat out on Thursday due to a sore groin, and passionate Twins fans can only hope that that groin problem does not improve. He's hitting a feeble .187 with an OPS of an almost-unimaginable .501. Punto is about ten plate appearances from qualifying for batting average statistics, but just to put that in perspective -- the next lowest OPS in the American League is .544, by Tampa Bay's Dioner Navarro. The numbers don't lie -- Punto is far and away the worst offensive player in the league. His defense, the attribute normally cited as the reason he makes $4 million a season, isn't so hot either; his fielding percentage is 15th out of 22 qualifying major-league shortstops, and he's made the seventh-most errors out of any shortstop in the league so far (5). Pretty pedestrian numbers for a guy with the fifth-highest contract on the team. And if you want a really good laugh, check out the Official Nick Punto Fan Club. So funny that it almost made me throw up.


The Twins travel to Tampa Bay, who are reeling right now, losers of five straight games and decimated with injuries. Scott Baker pitches tonight for the Twins against James Shields, a pitcher whom the Twins have had good success against.

MAY 18, 2009 -- NEW YORK 7, MINNESOTA 6

Ron Gardenhire does his annual "let's lose four" in the Bronx and the Twins are swept in a four-game series by an admittedly mediocre Yankee team. Mediocrity or not, these games might as well be the Harlem Globetrotters against the Washington Generals. Ron Gardenhire is the ideal coach for the bumbling Generals, and the Yankees continuous pummeling of the Twins is getting somewhat comedic. It sure makes for good entertainment if you're a Yankee fan (as you keep wondering if all these good things that people keep saying about the Twins aren't true) and absolute heartache for a Twins fan. With the loss, Gardenhire drops to 3-23 in the regular season in the Bronx and an incredible 16-44 career (including playoffs) against the Bombers. That's an unbelievably low .267 winning percentage -- just over once every four games does Gardenhire's Twins beat the Yankees. A team with a dead blind man managing the team could probably do as good as Ron Gardenhire does against the Yankees.

Same old story on Monday, however with a different twist. Glen Perkins did his best impression of pitching in the first inning, lasting one trip through the batting order before good ol' R.A. Dickey came in to save the day. By the time Perkins' night was through, he had given up six runs (four of which crossed the plate via the long ball) and gotten only two outs, one of which was a warning-track fly ball. Perkins topped his night off by giving up a pathetic hit to some guy named Francisco Cervilli -- yet another example of the Twins giving up hits to what I call "sore thumbs." They did it constantly last year with Jose Molina and they're back at it this year with Brett Gardner and Francisco Cervilli -- looking at that dreaded Yankee lineup, guys like Cervelli stick out like sore thumbs in the batting order and must be retired. Due to the one-run deficit at the end of the game, the hit to the sore thumb of the batting order was the difference of the game.

Dickey surprisingly mowed the Yankees down, but Ron Gardenhire was not satisfied with his bullpen putting zeroes on the board, so he put Luis Ayala into the game. Perhaps the worst pitcher in the American League, Ayala has continued to prove to everyone (except Ron Gardenhire, who has a demented sense of confidence in him) that he cannot get anybody out. Ayala was lucky to get through the sixth inning unscathed, but then he laid a 0-2 cookie right down the plate to Mark Teixeira leading off the seventh that he hit for a mammoth home run, which turned out to be the winning run in the ballgame. Hey, Gardenhire, are you watching the same game that I am? If Luis Ayala is able to pitch a scoreless inning, it's like you just got away with murder. You take him out of that game before the Yankees can process the fact that they were unable to get a run off of him. But, in another episode of "Gardy being Gardy," The Brain left Ayala in and the results were fantastic.

How 'bout Mike Redmond, folks? Representing the last out of the game, The Brain chose to go with Mike "No Gas Left in the Tank" Redmond to pinch hit for the pitcher-- er, Nick Punto. Redmond, facing left-hander Phil "Definitely Not Mariano Rivera" Coke, worked the count full and then started swinging at pitches feet from the strike zone. The game ended with Redmond literally swinging at a pitch half-way into the left-handed batter's box. For Pete's sake, Gardenhire, I could do that. Nick Punto could do that. Hell, I'd have sent up Jose Morales in that situation -- at least I've seen him get a hit that didn't make me want to puke. It was the perfect way to wrap up one of the most pathetic weekends of baseball I have ever seen in my life.

Why can't Gardenhire win in New York? It's pretty simple, I think. Gardenhire's well aware of his track record in the Bronx and he certainly lets his players know about that. There was a shot of Gardenhire Monday night after another failed scoring opportunity, shaking his head and chuckling to himself in disbelief. The failures in New York are so much a part of Gardenhire that it's the mentality that he conveys to his players. He's a scared manager managing a bunch of scared players. They are under the belief that it takes a perfect game to win in New York, so they play on pins and needles the entire time that they're there. If they could just relax and play their game, they'd do at least better than 3-23, which I don't think you could do if you tried to lose those games on purpose. Unfortunately, Gardenhire is a weak and shallow fool, and he imparts the fear of the Yankees that he experiences regularly to his players.

As it turns out, Glen Perkins had a bad elbow and that was the reason, aside from him sucking with a good elbow, that he was unable to finish one inning on Monday night. He was put on the disabled list and some guy named Sean Henn, he of a career record of 2-6 with a 7.56 ERA, was called up to replace him. With those numbers, it sounds like he'll fit into that bullpen real well.