APRIL 12, 2010 - MINNESOTA 5, BOSTON 2

Hello folks, Hank Rickenbacher checking in. Well, my son Henry gave me and Betsy tickets to Opening Day as a birthday present, so yours truly was at the Target Field for yesterday's festivities. Before we get to the game, I thought you folks would like a "Rickenbacker Review" of the Target Field.Now let me just say, I don't know why the Twins ever left Met Stadium for a football stadium named after a hippie. What was wrong with the Met? And I remember all the hype about the Metrodome before that place opened, and look how that turned out. So when I heard all the hubbub about the Target Field after two practices, I thought, let's not put the horse before the apple cart here.

Well, I don't want to be a drain on the old parade here, but let's just say the Target Field isn't perfect. I mean, it's a nice looking park and all, and for all the tax money they spent on the place it better be. But after the drive Betsy and I were hungry enough to eat a pony, so we got in line at one of the concessions. Of course all the kids in front of us had to use their debit cards and the debit card machine wasn't working, so we waited thirty minutes just to order. What happened to good old fashioned green backs? Anyway I ordered a hot dog and they said they didn't have any hot dogs at that stand. You could've rolled me over with a feather. A baseball game, and I couldn't get a hot dog. Betsy, bless her heart, ordered us cheeseburgers, but they tried to charge us nineteen dollars for the two of them. Like heck I was paying that for two cheeseburgers, so we just left and found our seats.

Of course we had to get the seats in front of the four loudmouth Boston kids who watched about three pitches of the game total and babbled on and on with those mobile phones instead. Betsy said if I let them get to me, they'd win. Well I'm no loser, but let me just say I don't want to talk about those Boston kids anymore. Except that those punks could have used about five bars of Lifeway to clean out those mouths, good Lord, and I let 'em know it too.

Well after all that there was still a game to be played, and that’s why I made the trip down for my first game since 1981, because I have high hopes about this team. And I’ll say it was a good game for this Twins fan. Pavano pitched 6 strong innings, outdueling the Lester kid from Boston. I for one was not impressed with this “Lesser” fellow. He started his outing with a walk, and after hits by Hudson, Cuddyer, and Kubel he was down 2-0. Later, Punto turned his monthly hit into a run, and a lucky hop off the bag on a patented Mauer grounder led to another run. In the 7th Kubel hit the first moon ball in the Target Field and even landed one section from me and Betsy.

The Twinkies showed some swagger Monday which was refreshing since they usually play frightened against the Big Boys. They smacked the ball around, came inside with some pitches (though with the feminine way that Youklis kid holds the bat, I’d throw at him too), and generally acted like they were the better team. Gardenhire tested the limits of cockiness when he trotted out Brad Duensing for the 7th and then to start the 8th too! If that kid gets you three 7th inning outs against the Red Sox, you thank your lucky stripes and have a good chuckle about it later. You don’t tempt fate by sending him out there again! Thankfully the joke ended with a screaming double from one of the Beantowners, and from there it was Guerrier and Rausch to close things out.

All and all, a decent visit to the new park. I suppose I would go back, but I’ll plan on having Betsy pack some ground ham sandwiches for us, because nineteen dollars for two cheeseburgers is criminal. The Twins are back at it Wednesday at noon, Slowey vs. Lackey. Hammering Hank, signing off.

Photos: (1) & (2) - AP/Ann Heisenfelt; (3) AP/Paul Battaglia

APRIL 10, 2010 -- MINNESOTA 2, CHICAGO 1

The winning ways continue in Chicago, as Jason Kubel bails out the rest of the lineup by smashing a two-run home run for the lone Twins scores of the game, and Scott Baker pitches well enough to pick up his first victory of the season. For the majority of seven innings, the Twins were handcuffed by White Sox retread fifth-starter Freddy Garcia, who has been reduced from the sometimes-dominant pitcher he once was for the Mariners and Chisox to a slop-throwing Quadruple-A pitcher who probably would be a better fit with his neighborhood beer-league softball team. Instead, the Twins looked baffled by Garcia, which is truly pitiful, but not as pitiful as the White Sox lineup, which appears to have lost nearly all of its potency that it had for years. But Kubel did the job, and the bullpen preserved the lead, including Jon Rauch, who picked up his fourth save of the season with relative ease.

Ron Gardenhire cannot escape the long arm of the MTRC, however, for his mismanagement in the top of the eighth inning. The Twins had the bases loaded and nobody out and Michael Cuddyer at the plate. Ozzie Guillen brought in reliever Scott Linebrink to pitch to Cuddyer, who predictably didn't get the job done. Cuddyer's one of the most un-clutch hitters around, and whenever there are runners in scoring position, Cuddyer seemingly always either pops up or strikes out. Cuddyer's patheticness cannot be attributed to Gardenhire. But the next at-bat absolutely must. Gardenhire let Alexi Casilla hit. Casilla, who had entered the game for basepaths-clogging Jim Thome an inning before, remained in the game as the DH and hit for himself. WHY? We're not quite sure why any person -- it doesn't even care how much they know about the game of baseball -- would let a guy like Alexi Casilla hit in that situation. What Gardenhire would probably tell you is that they didn't have any left-handed hitting options to face Linebrink, so Casilla was the best matchup for the situation. This, of course, is a self-defeating prophecy, as Casilla is as much a left-handed batter to be taken seriously as I am the star of the next Real World. You might as well put a lamp shade in the batter's box when Casilla's turn in the order is up. Of course, Casilla struck out, and the Twins failed to score after loading the bases with no outs. In a different game, when you're actually facing a quality opponent, that kind of managerial blunder costs you games. And when you're in a tight division that has necessitated the playing of a 163rd game the last two seasons, one game makes the difference. Because Gardy got off the hook with this move, expect it to happen again -- and expect it to backfire big time.

Like most successful seasons, the Twins are winning in spite of Ron Gardenhire's best efforts to lose the game. We'll see if the Twins can complete the sweep on Sunday, with Nick Blackburn facing Twins nemesis Mark Buehrle.

Photos: (1) AP/Paul Beaty; (2) AP/Jim Mone

OCTOBER 4, 2009 -- MINNESOTA 13, KANSAS CITY 4

The Twins' win on Sunday clinches a tie for the division title, and with the Tigers' win over the White Sox, for the second straight season the Twins will play in a one-game playoff for the right to go to the postseason. Before I continue, I would like to first thank my good neighbor "Hammerin'" Hank Rickenbacher, who graciously stepped in for me at the last second while I attended to a medical emergency. No need to worry about me -- it just so happened that a young person down in Iowa was recently stung by a nasty swarm of bees and the people down there needed an apiarist's knowledge as to containing the bees. To make matters worse, I knew the victim of the attack, and I felt compelled to drop everything (even during a pennant chase) and drove down to just outside of Dubuque. The one thing about apiary science that drew me to that field was its unpredictability, and it's the one thing that keeps my retirement only half-serious. I'm happy to report that all is well with the person affected by the bees, and I'm back here with a hive of those pesky suckers and I'm going to do a little research that just might be slacked on if there's some postseason whoopin' that the Yankees need to get to later this week. But anyhows, thanks a bunch Hank for the yeoman's work on the site.


As has been the case lately, the Twins' offense took control early, as they jumped on Royal starter Luke Hochevar with two home runs in the first inning. Jason Kubel would add a second three-run home run (I think that's the second time this season that Kubel's had a game in which he's hit two three-run blasts) and Seldom Young would also notch a second home run. Carl Pavano and the middle relief let KC inch back into the game, getting within four before the Twins blew it open in the later innings. So Sunday's game against the Royals will not be the Metrodome's swan song for major-league baseball, as at least one more game will be played there: Tuesday, 4 PM, Scott Baker vs. Rick Porcello. Imagine, for a second, if you're Porcello, who's 20 years old, one year removed from Single-A ball and pitching for the Tigers in the 163rd and potentially final game of the season. That story aside, the Twins are playing hot and the Tigers have languished for three weeks; not to mention the obvious home-field advantage that the Twins have. The Twins should easily win Tuesday's game. Easily. They've got their best pitcher on the mound opposing the Tigers' #3, their bats are clicking and they're at home. There's no reason to think that the Twins can't win, except for the fact that they're the '09 Twins, who are the baseball equivalent of a CD filler-song; something not good to stand alone on its own, but forgettable enough not to lament its brutality when surrounded by actual quality. In fact, it might be more memorable if the Twins lost Tuesday, as people would remember how favored the Twins were, only to lose. If they do drop the game, it'd probably be something pathetic like a 1-0 loss. Hmm, that sounds familiar...

Photos: AP/Jim Mone

OCTOBER 2, 2009 -- MINNESOTA 10, KANSAS CITY 7

They wouldn't be the 2009 Twins if they don't let a game against the 95-loss Royals in which they led by ten runs get far too interesting, as Kansas City scores the final seven runs in the ballgame but still loses by three. It was all probably a ploy to allow Joe Nathan to break the Twins' single-season saves record with his 46th save of the season, one-upping ex-Twins great Eddie Guardado's mark set in 2002. Though it got much too tense than it should have late in the ballgame, a win's a win, especially considering that Jake Peavy went out for the White Sox and totally dominated Detroit, and the Twins are still alive and kicking, one game out with two to go. If the Twins are to win both games against KC (a tough task considering they've drawn Zach Greinke today), Detroit will have to also win out to take the division without a one-game playoff. The scenario is so eerily similar to 2006, when the Tigers struggled for the last month of the season and limped into the playoffs while the Twins had been the hot team, getting into the playoffs on a high. As things often go, those patterns didn't stay true to form, as Detroit was the team that turned it on in the playoffs, getting to the World Series, and the Twins' season, which for all intents and purposes had ended on the last day of the regular season considering the lack of effort they gave forth in the ALDS against Oakland, was a stupendous flop for me. If the Twins win the division, they're going to celebrate their asses off, and then likely play some of the most embarrassing baseball anyone's ever seen against the Yankees. The biggest problem of this franchise is its mindset -- that a Central Division title is the end-all goal. That mindset owes a whole lot to its major endorser -- Ron Gardenhire.

As for Friday's contest, it appeared that the game was over by the second inning. Royals starter Lenny DiNardo was knocked out early after surrendering a Seldom Young grand slam in the first inning, among six hits he gave up in an inning-plus of work. Jason Kubel notched his 25th home run of the season in the 4th inning, and the entire Twins offense was clicking. In a trip back to simpler times, every Twins starter had at least one hit except Nick Punto, who so often loves being the exception to the rule offensively. Even Matt Tolbert got two hits, making it that much more possible that Ron Gardenhire decides to have a little more confidence in the Punch-and-Judy-meister. Jeff Manship got his first major league win, silencing those doubts as to why a guy who's pitched like regurgitated pumpkin seeds in the big leagues is pitching with the season on the line. The bullpen made it interesting, as always, as the vaunted combo of Crain-Mahay-Keppel allowed the Royals back in the game. On a side note, why is Bobby Keppel in the major leagues? This guy is such absolute garbage is hard to understand how he could make the St. Paul Saints or the Wichita Wingnuts, let alone a major-league roster, let alone a "contending" major league club. Remember the Oakland Disaster? The one game the Twins will look back on after this season and say, "why couldn't we keep a ten-run lead against a last place club?" Well, Keppel was a big part of that, and that question was nearly asked again on Friday, but luckily for the Twins, they held on, and, like Maxwell House, they're in it 'til the last drop.

Photos: AP/Jim Mone

SEPTEMBER 27, 2009 -- KANSAS CITY 4, MINNESOTA 1

The Twins revert back to their old ways, i.e. they go an incredible 1 for 14 with runners in scoring position against Zach Greinke and the Royals. What's funny is that the Twins were handling Greinke as good as any team has been, but when it came down to getting the clutch hit at the right time, the Twins were out to lunch. It sure didn't help that Francisco Liriano's "start" didn't go over too swimmingly, as he didn't even last two innings after giving up a three-run home run to arguably the worst player this side of Nick Punto, Yuniesky Betancourt. The Twins failing in the clutch is nothing new, of course, but what is notable is that the guys who really choked were the big boys -- Mauer and Kubel, to be precise, who both struck out in the third inning with the bases loaded. The Twins had a bevy of chances, and though Greinke is a superb pitcher and was able to work out of most of the jams, the Twins must take responsibility of losing what turned out to be a winnable game. It hurts even more when you see that the Tigers lost their game in Chicago; with both teams losing, the gap between the Twins and Tigers is still two games.

The Twins now travel to Detroit for the "Showdown in Motown," or whatever overhyped moniker they choose to attach to the series. If the Tigers win the series, they win the division, and in all reality the Twins need to take three out of four to make it interesting. A split would mean that the Twins would have to basically hope for a miracle to win the division. The way the pitching matchups line up, it would appear that the Twins would catch a break or two; Eddie Bonine and Nate Robertson are both slated to start games in the series, and they're not exactly intimidating hurlers to face. To give the Twins credit, they have made this series relevant, which is noteworthy when you consider that on Labor Day the Twins were seven games behind the Tigers. But the season still cannot be anything but a huge disappointment if the team doesn't finish in first place. For most teams, of course, the World Series is the ultimate goal, but in Twins Territory, winning the Central Division appears to be the holy grail, which would help to explain the Twins' pathetic showings in the playoffs in this decade (nothing left to play for, since the "goal" has been achieved). Here's to the Twins making it interesting in the Motor City.

Photos: AP/Ed Zurga

SEPTEMBER 19, 2009 -- MINNESOTA 6, DETROIT 2

The Twins are really going to be sorry that they are moving outdoors next year. Because they don't know how good they've got it at the Metrodome. Case in point Saturday afternoon, when a routine fly ball gets lost in the roof and pretty much wins the game for the Twins. If Orlando Cabrera's pop-up is hit in any other ballpark in the world, that's an easy out for outfielder Don Kelly, which makes it two out and a man on first in the bottom of the eighth inning. Instead, men were on second and third, and the entire dynamic of the inning shifted. Jason Kubel singled after the Tigers walked Joe Mauer intentionally, and the Twins led 3-2. That spelled the end of the day for Justin Verlander (who was certainly not showing signs of fatigue, pumping his 129th pitch of the day at about 98 miles an hour), and Michael Cuddyer chipped in sloppy seconds-style, crushing a three-run homer off Brandon Lyon for the insurance runs. Yeah, it's a win, but just about as cheesy as they get. It was kind of disappointing -- you just don't really know if the best team won on Saturday. I will say that I was surprised to see a rookie infielder-outfielder be put in the outfield for defensive purposes, someone (Kelly) who only had a few games of major league experience and little experience fielding flies at the Dome. Reminiscent of Ron Gardenhire's classic move of putting Jason Pridie in for defense in Toronto in his major league debut last season (a move that resulted in the Twins losing a winnable game because of Pridie, and by extension they lost the division because of that stroke of genius), Jim Leyland's ill-fated move may come back to haunt him big-time.

It was a great game to see as one's final trip to the Dome to see a Twins game. A classic pitchers duel between Carl Pavano and Verlander was clearly won by Verlander, as Pavano was wiggling out of trouble all game long. Pavano gave up a bundle of hits in his seven innings -- eleven to be exact -- but got the big outs when he needed them. Verlander was nothing short of dominant, and for his line to be what it ended up -- 7 and 1/3 innings, five earned runs -- is really a shame, because the Dome-double changed everything, and Lyon gave up two of those runs on the Cuddyer home run. It's clear that the Twins have the Tigers' number under the Teflon sky, and they'll go as far as exposing the weaknesses of the worst stadium in human history in order to solidify that dominance. But the Twins are the closest to first they've been in a long time, and more importantly they're four games above .500 (a season high) and have won six straight. They're getting hot at the right time, but unfortunately we still can't gauge whether they have the legs to stretch this hot streak for the remainder of the season. The Twins have had this disturbing pattern of playing really well for one week, and then playing like regurgitated Alpo the next. It was just one week ago that the Twins had just lost three straight to the likes of Brett Cecil and the Blue Jays and the last-place Oakland A's. The ten-game road trip will ultimately define the season, and even with a win today against the Tigers, the Twins don't have anything sealed up. Scott Baker pitches for the Twins today.

Photos: AP/Ann Heisenfelt

SEPTEMBER 14, 2009 -- MINNESOTA 6, CLEVELAND 3

Again the Twins sleepwalk through seven shutout innings against mediocre-at-best Jeremy Sowers, and it appeared as if the Twins were on their way, thanks to a late comeback win by the Tigers, to falling further behind Detroit. But then a funny thing happened on the way to third place: the Twins came back, picking themselves off the mat. A clutch three-run home run off the bat of Michael Cuddyer (no, really!) tied the game off reliever Chris Perez, and then the Twins used rinky-dinky cheeseball to take the lead. Matt Tolbert, playing in a "pennant race" for some reason, doinked a bloop double behind third base after Seldom Young had singled, and Young would score on a wild pitch/passed ball. Jason Kubel would launch a home run later in the at-bat, and the Twins' six-spot they put on the board in the eighth was enough to carry them past the pitiful Indians. It was nice to see the Twins win a game when their opponents' reliever put up a Matt Guerrier Special, but the biggest news of the night would come to the surface during the post-game interviews.


Justin Morneau's done for the season, as is Joe Crede's (most likely), as both players' backs have officially crapped out. Morneau, frankly, has been nothing short of terrible lately, but it goes without saying that this injury is potentially fatal for the Twins' chances of holding on to second place. Add Crede's injury, and that means a few things: one, it means more playing time for guys like Carlos Gomez and/or Seldom Young, and it means more playing time for Nick Punto and/or Matt Tolbert. Any way you cut it, the two injuries makes the Twins that much worse offensively. Especially when you have a manager who's willing to play guys like Matt Tolbert in "key games down the stretch," these injuries will force Ron Gardenhire to be creative, which is kind of like asking a kindergartener to go without cake at his birthday party. Lots of tears will ensue and it'll probably mean that you'll have to clean the drapes afterwards.


If the Twins want any shot at first place, they'll have to sweep the Tigers this weekend at the Dome, and if they really want that to happen, they're going to have to win these games against an inferior opponent in order to gain momentum. Scott Baker has been pitching lights-out as of late, and he faces Fausto Carmona, owner of some pretty ugly numbers who mowed down the Twins the last time he faced them.

Photos: (1) AP/Jim Mone; (2) AP/Ben Margot

SEPTEMBER 12, 2009 -- OAKLAND 4, MINNESOTA 2

Another loss at the hands of the pathetic Athletics drops the Twins two games under .500 and it's yet another example of the wasted opportunities that the Twins have had to gain on the suddenly slumping Tigers. Detroit hasn't won a game since last Sunday's thrilling comeback win in Tampa Bay, going 0-5, yet all the Twins have been able to do is gain a paltry game and a half on first place. In fact, with the White Sox winning yesterday in Anaheim, the Twins have fallen back to third place in the division -- this is notable considering the Twins had a 3 1/2 game lead over Chicago for second place just ten days ago. It makes you think that the Twins surely could have come back on Detroit, except for the fact that the Twins just aren't that good of a team. And it really doesn't help when minor-leaguers like Jeff Manship are called upon to stop the bleeding. Manship's longest start in the majors is a five-inning performance, and on Saturday he lasted only a few batters into the fifth. Walks came back to haunt the Twins in a big way, as the A's scored the two game-winning runs in the fifth without the benefit of a single base hit. Manship walked the first two batters (facing the eight and nine hitters, no less) and gave way to Jesse Crain, who promptly walked the first batter he faced. Two sacrifice flies later, the A's had a two run lead, and they used that same margin to coast to a victory.

Brett Anderson pitched like an ace against the Twins, mowing them down over seven innings. Michael Wuertz and Andrew Bailey slammed the door on the Twins in the late innings, and the Twins offense continued to sleepwalk down the stretch. The biggest tragedy of this season has been the fact that the Twins, with the talent they have, should be RUNNING AWAY with this division. Detroit hasn't shown any real moxie down the stretch following that Tampa Bay series, and the fact remains that 85 wins will likely win this division. Right now, the Twins can't guarantee themselves a winning season, and when you have guys like Mauer and Morneau and Span and Kubel all having career years or close to it (Morneau's last month and a half will be most remembered, however, as his struggles have stood for the struggles of the whole offense lately), you'd like to think you have a good chance to win a weak division. But it always comes down to pitching, and this season has been a flashback to the good old Dick Such days of the mid-90s. To rewrite the classic Simon and Garfunkel song, Where have you gone, Scott Aldred?

Photos: AP/Tom Olmscheid

AUGUST 29, 2009 -- TEXAS 3, MINNESOTA 0

The Twins follow up a nice victory against the Rangers on Friday with a pitiful effort against Scott Feldman and company, as they aren't able to score a single run off the Texas pitching staff and lose 3-0. Yet again, the Twins can't buy a hit with runners in scoring position, as they revert back to their old selves and strike out with guys at third and one out, as was the case so often for most of the season. The two biggest threats that the Twins posed were in the fifth and sixth innings against Feldman; in the fifth, Alexi Casilla struck out with Brendan Harris on third and one out. As you've probably noticed, Casilla's name has been largely absent from this site for a while, mainly because he was hitting much better than he had earlier in the season (granted, it's only a small accomplishment to raise your batting average from the .160-range to .201), but for that kind of non-production, Casilla's once again persona non grata here at the MTRC. Jason Kubel popped up in the same situation an inning later, and Michael Cuddyer's strike out to end the inning (what? Michael Cuddyer striking out in a pressure situation? No, really?) was the final nail in the coffin for the Twins. They didn't get a guy on base over the final three innings, and went softly into the night against the competitive Rangers. Again, the Twins fail to move on the Tigers, whose loss earlier in the day opened the door for the Twins to gain ground.

Carl Pavano didn't pitch horribly, but he did go out there and get his team in a hole right away, giving up two quick runs in the first inning. When your offense decides to take the day off, and collect only four hits and zero hits with guys in scoring position, two runs is far too many runs to give up. It's yet another example of the Twins failing to click on one facet of the game. Desparate for some kind of consistency in their starting rotation, it's that much more frustrating when their pitching can keep them in ballgames but then see the team lose because their offense phoned in the effort. Sure, they're only 4 and 1/2 games out, but the team that "we've all been waiting for" still hasn't come out to play this season, and that team that came out of spring training is a lot different than the players that are taking the field right now for the Twins. Pavano might as well be their ace for the starts that he's put forth, Brian Douchebag has a role that's much too big for a team that fashions itself as a contender, and as of Sunday Jeff Manship is going to be starting the Wednesday afternoon tilt against the White Sox, thereby becoming the second pitcher to be making his major-league debut during the "pennant chase." The one thing it certainly doesn't breed is a whole lot of confidence.

AUGUST 24, 2009 -- MINNESOTA 2, BALTIMORE 1

The Twins are able to scratch across two runs against the worst pitching staff in the American League, and they were lucky enough to do that. During Orlando Cabrera's at-bat in the sixth inning, a two-strike curveball by Baltimore starter Chris Tillman appeared to break straight across the middle of the plate belt-high. Even Bert Blyleven and Dick Bremer appeared to think that home plate umpire Paul Emmel made the incorrect call by judging the pitch a ball. With second life at the plate, Cabrera lined a single to center field, moving Denard Span to third base with nobody out, and Span would eventually score the game-winning run on a Jason Kubel sacrifice fly. But strangely absent from any post-game commentary was a rant by Baltimore manager Dave Trembley, who really should be bitching about umpires missing calls that turn out to be the difference of the game. I mean, what kind of manager wouldn't just take the easy way out and blame officiating when bigger, more crucial problems are actually in the manager's control to change? It was just very odd, this display of professionality and class by Mr. Trembley -- something that just would never happen if it were the other way around. It's always refreshing to know that whenever the Twins play another team, there's one professional manager in the stadium that doesn't cry over sour milk or whine and moan when things don't go his way. It's funny that, when the shoe is on the other foot, Ron Gardenhire's suddenly a quiet fan of Mr. Emmel's strike zone and poor calls.

So the Twins have run off four straight wins against last-place ballclubs; if we're talking about a good team, that wouldn't be noteworthy, but when we're discussing the 2009 Twinkies it should be duly noted. The problem is that you're only as good as the next game's starter, and in this case it's wild-eyed rookie Armando Gabino, who'll be making his major league debut against the Orioles. Since every game is extremely important from here on out, it's pretty hard to accept this line of reasoning from the front office and Ron Gardenhire, that Armando Gabino represents the best chance of netting the team a victory on Tuesday. It's usually the case, however, that rookie pitchers tend to have a successful first couple starts (see Swarzak, Anthony), due mostly to the fact that a solid advance scouting report has yet to be circulated throughout the league. The Orioles can hit, that's for sure, but I would be surprised if Gabino totally implodes. It's hard to expect wins out of guys pitching in the big leagues for the first time ever, and Gabino's no different. Hell, this guy was mainly a reliever for Rochester; he's started only five games for the Red Wings this year and only 13 in his entire professional career, dating back to 2004. It would appear that, out of the Red Wings' current staff, Yohan Pino would be more deserving of a major-league promotion, as he's pitched very well in eight starts in Triple-A since being promoted from New Britain. But whatever the case, the fact remains that games in late August that are the most critical to your ballclub just plain cannot be started by guys like Armando Gabino. Here's to eight innings of shutout ball, kid.

Photos: (1) AP/Tom Olmscheid; (2) www.rockcats.com

AUGUST 6, 2009 -- CLEVELAND 2, MINNESOTA 1

Go figure. The Twins' biggest problem in the last two weeks (and the entire year, really) has been consistently ineffective pitching. Their loss on Thursday had absolutely nothing to do with pitching and had everything to do with an absence of clutch hitting. The Twins went 0 for 13 with runners in scoring position, this against an Indian ballclub which boasts of the worst pitching staff in the American League. Fausto Carmona was absolutely destroyed the last time the Twins faced him in early June, as he didn't last more than two innings. Here's a guy who was such a mess that he was sent down to Rookie ball to try to figure things out. Even with his six inning, one-run performance on Thursday, Carmona's ERA sits at a devilish 6.66, and the Twins were unable to get anything more than one measly run against Carmona and company. I believe this loss to be somewhat of a forboding defeat. Though previous to this game I had serious doubts whether they could win the division, I think after Thursday's debacle that they're done. I know it's August, but these are the kind of games that made me think of 2005 and 2007 -- in that it seems that if the Twins hit and put 5-6 runs on the board, their pitching fails them and they lose, and the games which their pitchers give up one or two or three runs, their offense fails them and they lose. I know it's just one game, but it was the kind of game that sort of tells a larger story -- and this story doesn't end with the Twins making the playoffs.

It's hard to pin the blame on one hitter when the team went hitless in thirteen at-bats with runners in scoring position, and nobody had an RBI for that matter (the lone run scored on a wild pitch). The top of the second was perhaps the most pitiful of the scoring chances that the Twins squandered, and guess who's to blame there -- no, you didn't say the bottom of the lineup, did you? After a Michael Cuddyer walk and a Joe Crede double put runners on second and third with nobody out, it was up to Mike Redmond and Alexi Casilla to get those runners home. That previous sentence would make it seem like those players have done that sort of thing in the past, which I know is purely asinine logic, considering the actual talent those players don't possess. Redmond hit a soft liner to the second baseman, pathetically wasting the first chance the Twins had. Now it's Alexi Casilla's turn. This guy's had one -- count it, ONE -- hit this season of any circumstance, against the Mariners in the opening series of the year. That clutch hit has been supremely dwarfed in a gigantic shadow of mental mistakes, defensive miscues, infield pop-ups, strikeouts -- consistent failure at the plate. Against Carmona, there wasn't any doubt that Casilla would not get the job done, and sure as shit, he strikes out, and after Denard Span tapped back to the pitcher, the Twins had wasted a golden opportunity to break through.

The rest of the game featured chances in which the Twins' best hitters, Justin Morneau and Joe Mauer and Jason Kubel, could not get clutch two-out hitting, which is a hallmark of good clubs. Considering the opponent that the Twins played, the series they just completed against the Indians was probably the worst series of the season for the Twins, especially because they now head to Detroit with zero momentum. The upcoming series against the Tigers might be a make-or-break series. Four and a half games behind the Tigers already, the Twins could be as much as seven and a half back before the weekend is up. And they'll have to face two of the Tigers' top three pitchers, Justin Verlander and Jarrod Washburn, which amplifies the importance of Friday's game, in which the Twins will face the struggling Armando Galarraga, who has never beaten the Twins in five career decisions. If the Twins want to have a chance at winning the division, they need to win this series, but what evidence is there to make that a reasonable thing to ask of this ballclub? This would be a perfect time for Ron Gardenhire to take a closed-door meeting with his ballclub and lay down some parameters -- tell his team that certain play will not be tolerated and that his players would get benched for making mental mistakes. Oh wait, that just happened two weeks ago, and it turned out those threats turned out empty and the effectiveness of said meeting turned out to be marginal and the respect for the manager turned out to be superficial. Well, it was worth a try.

JULY 17, 2009 -- MINNESOTA 5, TEXAS 3

Glen Perkins opens the second half of the season by giving up a two-run home run to the third batter he faces, Josh Hamilton, and it would appear that the crucial ten-game road trip is off to a horrendous start. Collectively, it seemed as if Twins fans everywhere muttered, “Here we go again.” But then the Twins picked themselves off the mat, tied the game in the very next inning thanks to a two-run triple by Carlos Gomez, and then rode Jason Kubel’s three-run home run in the third inning to a 5-3 victory. Perkins really struggled through five innings, throwing over one hundred pitches in getting the undeserving victory. Again, Bobby Keppel pitches the six and the seventh and mows down the opposition, striking out three of the six batters. Though Keppel’s done a yeoman’s job in this sort of role, I still think that the jury’s out with this guy. The bad thing is, we’re going to have to find out about Keppel’s real lack of talent the hard way, because all indications are that Ron Gardenhire is going to not only continue to put Keppel in games, but continue to put him in close games. Sooner or later, Keppel’s gonna go Sean Henn on everybody’s ass, and Gardenhire was willing to lose games with Henn a handful of times. So when Keppel finally implodes, it’s going to be ugly, I guarantee that much.

Alexi Casilla came into this season coming off a career year in which he hit close to .300, played stellar defense, provided a speedy option at the top of the order, and even hit a few clutch home runs during the year. That being said, Casilla fell back to earth so hard this year that it was just one month into the season that Casilla was sent down to the minors, and quite frankly that decision was a few weeks too late. Casilla’s been recalled and sent back again this year, and now he’s with his third go-round with the club. He’s back to square one, needing to earn playing time, a la spring training, which for Ron Gardenhire means that Casilla starts at second base immediately AND bats second in the lineup. What the hell Gardenhire? What is with his whole “the second baseman must hit second in this lineup regardless of how low that average sinks?” Matt Tolbert was hitting there for a while, too. The only guy that has really flourished in that spot is Joe Mauer, but Gardenhire would rather have Mauer hit third, for good reasons. Brendan Harris was spanking the ball until a recent slump, which has precipitated his move to the bottom of the order. Do you see the logic in that? Harris has one bad week (lowering his batting average to a mere .270) and he’s relegated to the #8 hole; Casilla and Tolbert have sucked all year long and have not had their averages above the Mendoza Line since, well, Opening Day, and they’re plugged into the #2 hole like that’s how it’s always been. That just makes a whole hell of a lot of sense.

Scott Baker is definitely one of the keys for the Twins in the second half if they plan of making a push for the divisional title. He’s been wildly inconsistent this season and if the Twins want to go anywhere, Baker’s going to have to pitch like the ace pitcher he was last season. He pitches tonight in Texas, and he opposes Rangers righthander Scott Feldman.

JUNE 28, 2009 -- MINNESOTA 6, ST. LOUIS 2

The Twins complete a rare series victory on the road, riding a Justin Morneau three-run homer in the first inning and seven solid innings by Francisco Liriano to an easy 6-2 victory. The Cardinals could not be buoyed to a win by their new acquisition, Mark DeRosa, who batted cleanup for St. Louis and is pretty much the second-best hitter in their lineup behind Albert Pujols. The Twins only surrendered one base hit to Pujols when he doubled off of Matty Guerrier in the eighth inning, and importantly they walked him once. The Twins are very adamant in their no-walks approach to pitching, as they have perennially led the league in fewest walks ever since the current regime took over. What they need to realize is that sometimes walks are not necessarily a bad thing. Had they walked Albert Pujols on Saturday with runners on base instead of going after him, they may have won the game, and at the very least it would have forced the Cardinals to beat the Twins with secondary weapons. Pujols is a sore thumb in the St. Louis lineup, but in a good way -- he's the only guy with a good amount of talent in that lineup, so he sticks out like a sore thumb in a different way. Once again, the Twins let sore thumbs beat them on Saturday, but on Sunday they were fortunate to not have to face Pujols with guys on base. If that would have happened, Ron Gardenhire certainly would not have walked him, because he's too hellbent on not playing "embarrassing baseball." It's funny what Gardy considers embarrassing -- I think that a manager stupid enough to pitch to the best hitter in the league just so he can gain some points with Tony LaRussa is red-faced embarrassing, but that's just me.

Morneau snapped out of his funk with the home run in the first inning, but he was right back at it in the third, grounding into a double-play with runners on first and second and nobody out. It would have been a rally killing double play had it not been for Jason Kubel, who picked up Morneau with an RBI single in the next at-bat. Kubel is increasingly showing his value for the Twins, and with Morneau being a very streaky hitter, Kubel has been a rock in the #5 hole for the Twins. He's been surprisingly consistent and he's arguably had some of the biggest hits of the year for the Twins. Say what you will about Morneau, but I'd take Jason Kubel in a clutch situation any day of the week and twice on Sunday. Morneau continues to take some ugly swings -- it's definitely not the kind of swing that you'd like to teach your twelve-year old. He constantly steps in the bucket and he takes his left hand off the bat during his follow-through. It's really not pretty, but if he's hitting thirty homers and driving in 120 ribbies, I'll take it. But you just don't see too many game-tying hits late in the ballgame from Morneau. And the fact is, he's always going to get good pitches to hit, especially the way that Kubel's been going. With Joe Mauer hitting before you and a red-hot Kubel following you, Morneau's always going to be given fastballs. He's been in a rut of late, but thankfully Kubel has been perhaps more valuable all season long, and he's always there to pick up the team.

The Twins have surprisingly won both series to start this 9-game road trip, though both games that they have lost they really could have and should have won. Now they get to travel to Kansas City, and the Royals have really struggled in the last month and a half. The Twins get a break because they won't have to face Zach Greinke in the series. Staff ace Nick Blackburn looks to rebound from the eighth-inning disaster on Wednesday against the Brewers tonight as he opposes Kansas City youngster Luke Hochevar.

JUNE 26, 2009 -- MINNESOTA 3, ST. LOUIS 1

The Twins snag an easy, breezy win in hot and humid St. Louis Friday night, as they ride the pitching prowess of Glen Perkins and the shaky bullpen to a 3-1 win. A clutch two-out hit from Jason Kubel in the first inning provided the spark for the Twins, who were also aided by a Cardinal error in scoring their second run of the opening frame. Michael Cuddyer singled home Kubel in the sixth inning for the Twins' final run, and the lead would hold up against the shockingly average Cardinal lineup. I said in Milwaukee that I was unimpressed with the Brewer lineup and surprised that they were just a game out of first place; now I'm even more flabbergasted to see the Cardinals, who held first place coming into the game. Beyond Albert Pujols and maybe Ryan Ludwick, the Cardinals offense scares no one, and their pitching isn't overwhelming either. I'd love to say, hey, it's a credit to Tony LaRussa's expert managing that he always seems to find a way to compete with the players he's given, but people say that all the time about Ron Gardenhire, and I've found that to be undeserved praise. Some teams just get lucky consistently, and that's certainly the case with Ron Gardenhire's Twins, and it's also probably true with the Cardinals. Both teams are fortunate to play in weak divisions, but what separates the two is LaRussa's actual talent as a playoff manager. Gardenhire's good enough to get the team into the playoffs, but LaRussa isn't satisfied with that. He's been to the playoffs literally thirteen times with three ballclubs -- he wants to win the World Series, dammit, and he's done that twice, too.

In the top half of the eighth inning, Matt Tolbert struck out in front of the pitcher's spot for the third out of the inning, making it possible for Glen Perkins to go out and pitch the bottom half of the inning. With 82 pitches and in complete command of the game, it would be the logical choice. After all, your bullpen has failed you consistently for a few seasons in a row, now, and even Ron Gardenhire himself said that he'd like to get more innings out of his starters. Well, what you could do for a start is not take out Glen Perkins after 82 pitches. Of course, unreliable ol' Matty Guerrier started the eighth inning and promptly gave up two singles. There seemed to be a collective rumbling from Twins Nation that said, "Here we go again," but then Guerrier came back to strike out Tyler Greene, and then surprisingly Ron Gardenhire came out of the dugout and brought in Jose Mijares to face Skip Schumacher. It's going to be a collective Matt Guerrier Special, I thought, but then Mijares bailed out Guerrier, Gardenhire, and the Twins by inducing a double-play grounder on the only pitch he threw. Joe Nathan came in and pitched a clean ninth inning, and perhaps providing the highlight of the game when he fanned Pujols when the slugger represented the tying run.

No doubt Gardenhire would have cited the unbearable St. Louis heat for taking out Glen Perkins. Gardenhire's a better liar than most of us think, and he gives more excuses than a petulent five year old. He may have even referred to a scary incident in the stands, when a fan toppled headfirst from the second deck to the lower bowl of the stadium from an apparent case of fainting. "We need Perk ready for his next start," Gardy would likely cop out. Most likely, however, taking out Perkins on Friday was directly influenced by his decision to keep Nick Blackburn in the game on Wednesday, and that ended with Blackburn giving up the Little League home run that lost the game for them. And that whole spiel about "keeping the starters in longer?" Yeah, you can pretty much throw that out the window. The only thing that's probably going to change is that Sean Henn won't be called on to lose games anymore, and his role has likely been relegated to long-relief mop-up duty. Gardenhire just feels a heckuva lot more comfortable losing with Matt Guerrier in the eighth, and with the status quo resumed, we're probably in for a sequel of last year -- by that I mean a second place finish. They won't be nearly as close as they came in 2008, though; my odds are that the Tigers will run away with the division, winning it by about ten games.

JUNE 13, 2009 -- MINNESOTA 2, CHICAGO (NL) 0

Anthony Swarzak puts in his best performance as a major-league pitcher, buckling down against the struggling Cubs and tossing seven shutout innings, and the Twins hold on for a 2-0 victory, their second consecutive victory at Wrigley Field. And what does Swarzak get as a reward for his second major league win? A demotion to the minor leagues. Ron Gardenhire's bench is razor thin, as Dizzy Span and Michael Cuddyer both are unavailable to hit, and he prefers to have another bench player, so Jose Morales was called up from Triple-A to provide the team another option off the bench. With Glen Perkins coming off the DL on Tuesday, the move to option Swarzak was not all that surprising (especially considering Ron Gardenhire's preference of talent-deficient players) but what remains mystifying is the fact that Michael Cuddyer was not put on the disabled list weeks ago when this finger started giving him problems. He hasn't done jack since the finger started swelling two weeks ago, and he's not a very good player to begin with. Sending Cuddyer to the disabled list would have allowed the Twins to handle the Swarzak demotion with a little more grace. As it turns out, the Twins look like primo dickheads after the move.

Jason Kubel's home run in the second inning and Joe Mauer's two-out single in the third inning, which drove home Nick Punto (inexplicably on base with a single) provided enough offense to carry the day for the Twins. Kubel's been the hottest Twins hitter of late, which is saying something considering Joe Mauer hasn't really stopped hitting since returning from the DL. If it weren't for Swarzak and the pitchers mowing the Cubs lineup down, the major talking point in the game would have been the struggles of the lineup. But they were facing Rich Harden, a pitcher who is dominant when healthy, which isn't too often. And the Twins aren't 100% healthy, either. Brendan Harris has been doing an admirable job in the lead-off position since Span has been unavailable, but he's better suited for the 6 or 7 hole in the lineup. And of course Nick Punto is back with the team, which cripples your lineup on a daily basis. I like it how the writers and broadcasters keep referring to these interleague games as unique because the Twins have to bat the pitcher when playing in National League parks. Wait a minute -- the Twins bat a pitcher in every game, and his name is Nick Punto. I think that's why the Twins are so successful in interleague games -- they're so used to playing National League baseball because they regularly feature a hitter who bats like a pitcher does in their lineup. Now that you think about it, it is surprising that the Twins are so successful playing interleague games on the road, because with Nick Punto batting eighth, there are back-to-back pitchers in the batting order. Hey, the Twins got a run out of Punto on Saturday, so they should be laughing all the way to the bank.

The Twins face a tough, hot lefty in Ted Lilly on Sunday. Lilly has been lights-out as of late, and the Twins have struggled against left-handers all year long, especially on the road. Their two wins in Oakland, games which were started by lefties Brett Anderson and Dallas Braden, were the Twins' first wins this year on the road in games started by southpaws. Lilly's more than a little bit better than those pitchers, and with the unpredictable Scott Baker on the mound, the chances for a Twins sweep aren't that great. But the Twins have salvaged at least a .500 road trip with the series win at Wrigley, which is awesome considering their road woes to date.

JUNE 10, 2009 -- MINNESOTA 6, OAKLAND 3

A great win by the Twins on Wednesday, as they come back on the Oakland bullpen and win with three runs in the top of the ninth inning. Jason Kubel had a huge hit, a pinch-hit home run in the eighth inning that tied the game for the Twins, and Seldom Young came through with the game-winning hit in the next inning. Joe Crede tripled for the Twins to lead off the ninth against Oakland closer Andrew Bailey, and after a predictable Michael Cuddyer pop-up, Young came through with an unpredictable clutch hit. Young had been making up for lost time for most of the game when he struck out twice -- no doubt starting a new streak after his 13-game run with at least one strikeout was snapped on Tuesday. The bullpen inexplicably did its job on Wednesday, as Matt Guerrier picked up the cheap win. It was perhaps the best win of the season for the Twins, who won back-to-back games on the road for the first time in a month and a half. They go for the series win on Thursday afternoon, with staff ace Nick Blackburn opposing rookie Trevor Cahill.

Carlos Gomez started the game in the leadoff position, which is as dumb a move as Ron Gardenhire can do at this point. What attribute, aside from Gomez' speed, makes Gomez a legitimate lead-off hitter? Certainly not his hitting -- he's hitting a measly .216. He can't get on base to save his life either; he rarely takes pitches in an at-bat, has the second-worst on-base percentage on the team (to Alexi Casilla), and has drawn only ten walks in 125 at-bats. Definitely not his ability to bunt, either, as he displayed in the fifth inning. The Twins had runners on first and second and nobody out, and Gomez came to the plate in an obvious bunting situation. The A's had just taken a 3-2 lead and it was imperitive for Gomez to lay down a sacrifice. Once again, Gomez failed at the easiest thing to do in professional sports when he bunted back to the pitcher and Oakland was able to get the force out at third base. I understand that Denard Span is going through these dizzy spells and his lead-off spot was up for grabs, but why Gomez, Gardenhire? The guy is one of the worst players on the team, and the lead-off position is a vital spot in the lineup. I might have put Joe Mauer in the leadoff position for the mere reason that he gets on base, which is the primary function of a good lead-off hitter. But, in Gardenhire's demented mind, he feels that the equation should read [lead-off position = speed], so he put one of the worst options in the lead-0ff position. At least Gardenhire knew when to take Gomez out of the game, as he pinch-hit Kubel in the eighth inning for him and Kubel came through with the tying home run.

Not much else to discuss here today. Though this blog does tend to take a pessimistic view of the Twins, it's refreshing to see a game in which most aspects of the game were clean. Sure, I disagreed with Gardenhire's management (why you pinch-run Casilla for Joe Crede at third base in the ninth inning I still don't know -- you're only gaining a step or two with Casilla running ninety feet, and there's a limited amount of plays that that move is going to advantage you, like a medium-deep fly ball. A grounder to the drawn-in infield and a cheetah would be thrown out at the plate, and anyone can score on a base hit. Plus, you sacrifice defense when you put Casilla on the field in place of Crede). But overall, it was a good win that secures at least a split in Oakland, and the road-trip, once in danger of being another nightmarish stretch of games, is now 3-3. With Blackburn on the mound, the Twins have a good chance of taking the series and giving the team a good head of steam heading to Wrigley Field. Though I am critical of the team and sometimes harsh, it needs to be said that I am a true, die-hard fan, and my frustration that I exude on this blog is but an indication of my undying passion for this team.

JUNE 4, 2009 -- MINNESOTA 11, CLEVELAND 3

The Twins had their hitting shoes on Thursday, as they went deep four times against Fausto Carmona and the Indians en route to an 11-3 romp. Jason Kubel was the hitting hero for the Twins, belting two three-run home runs in his first two at-bats of the game. Six RBIs for Kubel in the first two innings -- it appeared that Kubel had a good chance of matching or breaking the club record for ribbies in a game (8, by the unlikely pair of Glenn Adams and Randy Bush). Eric Wedge had the nads to intentionally walk Kubel in the eighth inning with runners on second and third, when the Twins were up by seven runs. Such a bush-league move for a classy manager -- for all the griping I do about Ron Gardenhire, I don't think even The Brain would do something as low as that.

Scott Baker pitched fantastic for the first four innings on Thursday, then hit a rut in the middle innings, which is settling into the norm for Baker. He ended up with a career-high ten strikeouts on the afternoon, and the only real blemish on his line was giving up a home run to a guy named Chris Gimenez, who was starting his first major-league game. Sean Henn pitched a clean two innings to complete the ballgame.

The bottom of the Twins lineup, which has been an Achilles heel for the team so far, continued their struggles, as the vaunted 7-8-9 hitters -- Mike Redmond, Carlos Gomez, and Matt Tolbert -- combined to go 1 for 12. Tolbert especially had a terrible approach at the plate, seeing eight pitches total in his four at-bats. It's becoming increasingly clear that Tolbert does not belong in the major leagues, and with Alexi Casilla the only other option the Twins are willing to use at second base, the Twins appear to be doomed at the position. It's not as if the organization is very strong in the minor leagues as well (Danny Valencia and Luke Hughes are natural third basemen). It's a glaring hole that needs to be addressed, and soon. The defense at the position is really disheartening, as that was the main reason that Gardy was willing to put the offensively-challenged Casilla and Tolbert there in the first place. They've both been underwhelming defensively and consistently phone it in at the plate.

The Twins now embark on a three-city, ten-game road trip that could spell doom for the club. The first stop is Seattle's Safeco Field, which surprisingly turned out to be a house of horrors last season for the team. Though the Mariners have cooled off considerably from their good start, the Twins appear to be behind the eight-ball with the pitching matchups in all three games: Felix Hernandez, Jerrod Washburn, and Eric Bedard. Factor in the Twins' miserable record on the road (6-16) and taking just one game from the M's this weekend might be a godsend. The Twins will be sending Francisco Liriano to the hill again tonight. If he contributes another messy four-inning, five-run performance, it's going to be hard for Ron Gardenhire to allow Liriano to stay in the rotation. It would be easy for other managers to take a guy with a 2-7 record and a 6.60 ERA (fourth-worst in the league) out of the rotation, but we're talking about Ron Gardenhire; time and experience has taught me not to expect logic and wisdom out of The Brain.