JUNE 6, 2009 -- SEATTLE 2, MINNESOTA 1

The Twins lose pathetically on Saturday to an inferior Seattle team, 2-1. The Twins have managed a whopping three runs in nineteen innings at Safeco Field -- one was unearned thanks to a Seattle error, one scored on a sacrifice fly and the other (the lone run Saturday) was driven in compliments of an unlikely two-out double by Mike Redmond. Sure, the Mariners lead the American League in earned-run-average, but let's be honest -- Jerrod Washburn is about as average a pitcher as you can get, and you don't deserve to win when you only scratch across one run in seven innings against him. A guy with twenty-three letters in his last name (Chris Jakabakabuskaskasbuskgsahskghve) actually got the win, and Ron Gardenhire introduced a new role for career minor-league veteran Sean Henn -- losing games in the eighth inning. There's a lot to get to, so away we go.


Let's start with the idiotic decision to let Henn pitch the eighth inning. Apparently the inning was Henn's altogether, as Jose Mijares and his two-thirds of an inning on Friday dictated a complete day off on Saturday. Henn hasn't been pitching terribly, but let's remember that Henn has bounced around from organization to organization and has a 7+ ERA in the majors for his career for a reason -- he sucks. With Ron Gardenhire, things like logic always take a back seat to stupidity, and Saturday was a perfect example. When dealing with his terrible bullpen, Ron Gardenhire usually lets a new guy get into clutch situations after about five or six good appearances, no matter how ugly the guy's career numbers may be (see Breslow, Craig). Henn's role at first was mostly mop-up duty, but after five appearances, Henn's role has changed into eighth-inning tie-game preserver. Wait, what???!!! On what planet does that make sense? It's not like Gardenhire's bullpen was really taxed after Friday's game, and Henn had pitched nearly forty pitches in Thursday's game. It doesn't quite follow that Henn can quite be called upon to lose games in the eighth inning. Frankly I'm more used to Matt Guerrier or Jesse Crain doing that, and I'd rather not see the new guy assume this role. Just stick to the norm, Gardenhire -- you're good at that. If you were hellbent on losing the game in the eighth inning, stick in Guerrier. He's already in The Doghouse.


The offense again was a no-show, and the top of the order again failed to produce. The 1-2-3 hitters in the lineup -- Span, Mauer, and Morneau -- are a combined 1 for 21 in the series thus far. It's no wonder the Twins have scored three runs in two games. Compounding that suckiness is the fact that the bottom of the order has actually produced hits; if the top of the order was producing in the series, the Twins could have had two routs on the books instead of two pathetic 2-1 games. The third inning was the epitome of the Twins' road patheticness. With the bases loaded and one out, Justin Morneau struck out pitifully -- waving at three outside sliders from Washburn. I'm not here to bash Morneau, but he'll do this far too often than is to be expected from an MVP. Especially on the road, where you guys are an unbelievably bad 7-17, you NEED to get the runs home in these situations. When your RBI men are at the plate, there's no striking out against retread veteran lefthanders.


This team will go as far as Mauer and Morneau will take them; right now they're taking them as far as .500. I wouldn't expect much more out of this team this year, especially considering that one-half of their games are on the road, where they've been so bad that it's hard to watch this season. The month of June may turn out to be the critical month for the Twins, as they only play six more home games for the remainder of the month. The prospects for the road trip are not looking good; it's not as if they're playing very stiff competition, but knowing the Twins on the road, they'll be lucky to break even in those games. My prediction for the month: Twins go 10-12 for the remainder of the month (5-1 at home, 5-11 on the road).



Seldom Delmon Young was at it again on Saturday, being pathetic in every aspect of the game. At the plate, Young went 1 for 3 (we'll get back to that one hit) with two strikeouts, extending his streak of consecutive games with at least one strikeout to twelve. He's struck out two times in a game four games in a row -- the last time he didn't strike out twice in a game was five games ago, when he struck out three times. For a guy who rarely hits the ball with any sort of authority, that's just absolutely pathetic. In the field, Young had a classic misplay in the first inning, when he nearly played Russell Branyan's pop fly into an inside-the-park home run. Fortunately for Young and the Twins, the ball bounced out of play for a ground-rule double; had the ball stayed in play, Branyan would have at least had a triple, and a home run would not have been out of the realm of possibility. Then there's baserunning. Young actually got on base in the third inning thanks to a rare single, and he was at third with two outs following Morneau's clutch strikeout. Joe Crede was at the plate, and Washburn uncorked a wild pitch. Young, of course, had a terrible break on the play, and was thrown out miserably trying to score. Hey, Young, you suck at the plate and in the field -- can you do me a favor and at least run, you sonofagun? Though I can't fault the coaching staff for this one, as you really can't practice baserunning before you work out Young's swing -- there's no point in practicing how to run the bases if you never get to first base.


Speaking of running, why was Carlos Gomez pinch running in the ninth inning if he was not planning on stealing a base? The Brain put him in there for Mike Redmond after Red Dog walked with one out, and it appeared obvious that Gomez was put in to utilize his speed and steal second base. He's the fastest runner on the team, so we keep hearing (though we rarely see it, as we all know you can't steal first base, and Gomez hitting his way on base -- ha ha, good one). The Twins were down by one run, and a stolen base would put the tying run in scoring position. But, Gomez was anchored to first base. My question is, if Gomez was not running, why even pinch run for Redmond? Apparently Gardenhire was banking on Brian Buscher (.208) to hit a double, because that would have been the only logical reason for Gomez to pinch run for Redmond and not steal a base. Yes, Gomez has defensive prowess, but for how "fast" the guy is, he's a terrible baserunner with even worse instincts and even worse smarts. Gomez' report card:


Fielding A-
Baserunning F
Hitting F-
Bunting F-
Intangibles F
Pissing off the best players on opposing teams (Cliff Lee, Mark Teixeira, e.g.) A.


Kevin Slowey goes for win number 9 (number 9...number 9 -- Beatles, anyone?) against Eric Bedard, who again tries for his first win against the Twins. Bedard's too good of a pitcher to go this long without a victory against the Twins, and Slowey's run of good luck is apt to run out soon enough, so expect a Mariners win.