AUGUST 16, 2009 -- CLEVELAND 7, MINNESOTA 4

I had the (dis)pleasure of watching Sunday's pathetic rubber match with the Cleveland Indians in person at the Metrodome. I have to tell you, it doesn't look any better when you're at the game than it appears on television; any way you can disect Nick Blackburn's imitation of "pitching," it was absolutely horrible. What's worse is that the six run third inning that Blackburn started (and Jesse Crain inexplicably finished) came directly on the heels of a three-run second inning by the Twins that gave them a 3-0 lead over the Indians and their newfound nemesis, Aaron Laffey. Hell, I thought I was fortunate enough to witness a minor miracle when Seldom Young blasted a home run to center field in that three-run frame, and I had a good feeling that Blackburn could get off the schneid and post his first victory since Ron Gardenhire rested him for a week and a half at the All-Star break. Blackburn, who had retired the first six batters with relative ease through the first two innings, faced the bottom of the Cleveland lineup to start the third, and what does he do? He gives up a towering fly ball that lands in the seats to Kelly Shoppach (still can't believe that ball went out), a home run bombed to right field by the light hitting Luis Valbuena, hits 9th-place hitter Andy Marte and gives up a tape-measure fuhgettaboutit blast to Grady Sizemore. Just like that, within a matter of minutes, the Twins lead had vanished, and of course Ron Gardenhire kept the downtrodden Blackburn on the mound in order to give up two more runs before the inning was up. Why Gardenhire went to Jesse Crain in the third inning is beyond me (don't get me wrong -- the only innings he deserves are mop-up duty in a wiffleball game) and not one of their four long relievers -- Jeff Manship being the newbie of that group. But whatever, Ronny Boy -- the game (and the season) was lost long before Sunday's contest.


The goat of the game just may have been Orlando Cabrera, who had one of the worst all around games I've ever had the privilege to watch first hand. Cabrera went 0 for 5 at the plate and found a way to make seven outs in those five at-bats, courtesy of two double plays that Cabrera banged into. To make matters worse, Ron Gardenhire has Cabrera hitting second in the lineup, protecting Joe Mauer, so with Cabrera's pathetic day at the plate, that insured that Mauer would not be hitting with runners on base all game long. His biggest folly was his second GIDP, which came in the seventh while the Twins were mounting a mild rally. With runners on first and second, Cabrera grounded into the Twin killing with Joe Mauer waiting on deck. Cabrera struck out for the final out in the game in the ninth, and Joe Mauer again was the tying run, left in the on-deck circle. To make matters worse, Cabrera's defense again betrayed him. He made a bad error on an easy play in the third inning that would have loomed larger had the Indians taken advantage of the error, and also showed his lack of range by failing to field a grounder that went for a base hit later in the game. He extended his major-league lead of most errors out of anyone playing in the bigs with his 18th boot of the season. Yeah, he's an awesome pickup.


Seldom Young's two-run blast in the second inning was also not without its repercussions, as that meant that he had to play the rest of the game like he's played it the majority of the season, namely like he's the worst player ever to pick up a bat. Those qualities were ever so apparent in the bottom of the fourth, when Young bounced into an inning-ending double play, wasting a bases loaded, one out opportunity for the Twins to get back in the game. Considering what Laffey and the rest of the Indians pitchers were giving them (not much mound presence, very hittable pitches), the Twins seemed to be sleepwalking through this match. It appears as if some players have begun to merely phone in the effort on what has become a lost season -- Michael Cuddyer's someone who has routinely called in sick whenever the game is on the line, and especially now with the chance of the postseason slim to none (the Twins are officially closer to fourth than first with Sunday's loss), expect those players who aren't playing for a contract to give decidedly half-assed efforts. There is one saving grace, and it's probably the only reason (other than the maintenance of this blog, of course) that I'm going to want to watch the Twins the rest of the season -- and that of course is Joe Mauer. If he hits like he did in May (which is a tall order, no doubt) he has a legitimate shot at hitting .400. Reaching such a coveted milestone may come with a downside for the Twins, however. If he does do something historic this season, that just means that the Red Sox and Yankees are going to try that much harder to sign this guy once his contract is up after next season. The big question will remain: Will the Twins try to put a World Series competitor (not just an A.L. Central Division championship competitor) on the field and convince Mauer that they are serious about winning?


Photos: (1) AP/Paul Battaglia (2) AP/Hannah Foslein (3) AP/Tom Olmscheid