An absolutely humbling ass-kicking by the Yankees leaves the Minnesota Scaredy-Cats reeling. Sure, it's only one game, but to lose at home by such a margin to any team is not what you're looking for from a "competing" team. Again, it's Ron Gardenhire "motivating" his players to play the Yankees -- which doubtless includes scare tactics, psychological terror, and perhaps even death threats. Gardenhire might even pop in an old VHS copy of The Deer Hunter and fast forward to that whole Russian Roulette thing before the Twins play the Yankees, because it's getting to that level of absolute ridiculousness. The games are pretty much over before they even start, and when you have a starting pitcher like Scott Baker throw 86 pitches and get nine people out, you're not going to have much of a chance to win. Couple that patheticness with the fact that the Yankees had C.C. Sabathia on the mound, and by the third inning, the Twins were done. Stick a fork in them, they are done.The Yankees are the team that has introduced this audience to the idea of sore-thumbs getting key hits, and Tuesday was no exception. The bottom three in the Yankee lineup -- Robinson C
ano, Brett Gardner, and Francisco Cervelli -- went an astonishing 7 for 14 against Baker, Brian Duensing, and R.A. Dickey. Hell, even Gardner and Cervelli alone had more hits combined than the entire Twins lineup. If you want to have a chance at beating the Yankees, guys like Francisco Cervelli -- maybe the only guy that the average fan goes, "Who?" when he looks at the lineup -- need to be retired. The only reason I know who the hell Francisco Cervelli is is that the Twins did this last time they faced the Yankees, in that nightmarish four-game sweep in the Bronx. The Twins were giving up clutch hits to Cervelli then and they do it again on Tuesday at the Metrodome. What was really bad about the Twins is not that they gave up sixteen hits to the Yankees -- that's almost a given nowadays when the Twins play the Yanks. It was the seven walks that they surrendered that was the real back-breaker. Case in point, the fourth inning. Baker gave up a single and two walks to load the bases before leaving the game with zero outs in the fourth. Brian Douchebag came into the game, allowed a pop-out and a sacrifice fly and appeared to be working out of the jam by giving up only one run. Then he walked two guys in a row, the second free pass bringing in a run. After the fifth run scored, it was pretty much a sealed deal that the Yankees won the game. It didn't help that the vaunted combo of Duensing and R.A. Dickey imploded in the sixth, when the Yankees scored five more runs to make the game a laugher.
ano, Brett Gardner, and Francisco Cervelli -- went an astonishing 7 for 14 against Baker, Brian Duensing, and R.A. Dickey. Hell, even Gardner and Cervelli alone had more hits combined than the entire Twins lineup. If you want to have a chance at beating the Yankees, guys like Francisco Cervelli -- maybe the only guy that the average fan goes, "Who?" when he looks at the lineup -- need to be retired. The only reason I know who the hell Francisco Cervelli is is that the Twins did this last time they faced the Yankees, in that nightmarish four-game sweep in the Bronx. The Twins were giving up clutch hits to Cervelli then and they do it again on Tuesday at the Metrodome. What was really bad about the Twins is not that they gave up sixteen hits to the Yankees -- that's almost a given nowadays when the Twins play the Yanks. It was the seven walks that they surrendered that was the real back-breaker. Case in point, the fourth inning. Baker gave up a single and two walks to load the bases before leaving the game with zero outs in the fourth. Brian Douchebag came into the game, allowed a pop-out and a sacrifice fly and appeared to be working out of the jam by giving up only one run. Then he walked two guys in a row, the second free pass bringing in a run. After the fifth run scored, it was pretty much a sealed deal that the Yankees won the game. It didn't help that the vaunted combo of Duensing and R.A. Dickey imploded in the sixth, when the Yankees scored five more runs to make the game a laugher.The Twins' first run was driven in by Michael Cuddyer on a -- wait for it, wait for it -- solo home run (!!!) in the second inning. This seems to be the only way this guy d
oes anything at the plate. I was talking to a friend who happens to be a Brewers fan the other day and I had mentioned my frustrations at Cuddyer, who is dangerously close to being in The Doghouse. He looked at Cuddyer's stats and wondered why I had it out for him, and then I had to explain the method to Cuddyer's madness. It was the same with Torii Hunter when he played here (though Hunter was a much more beloved player, something I'll never understand. The guy never had a clutch hit in his entire career, but he made great defensive plays. I just goes to show you that it's not the long ball that the chicks dig but the defensive plays -- Carlos Gomez is a horrendous offensive player but people are fans of him because he can make a diving catch. People like Hunter and Gomez can consistently wilt in the clutch at the plate but because they can cover some ground in the outfield, they've got in made in the shade, complete with a mega-million-dollar contract). Cuddyer's production is based mainly on tacking on meaningless runs in blowout wins or by hitting homeruns when the team is down by a ton. The two best games for Cuddyer were back-to-back games in late May, when he had four hits in two straight games, one of which was a cycle. The Twins won those games 20-1 and 11-3. Nine of Cuddyer's 14 home runs are of the solo variety, and not many of his home runs have really factored in a game (I'd say two or three). Yeah, he might have "good" numbers at the end of the season, but can anyone remember a clutch hit that this guy's ever had? By clutch I mean a two-out hit that either ties the game or puts the team ahead late in the ballgame (seventh inning and later). I'll be delighted to hear from anyone who can remember such an instance.
oes anything at the plate. I was talking to a friend who happens to be a Brewers fan the other day and I had mentioned my frustrations at Cuddyer, who is dangerously close to being in The Doghouse. He looked at Cuddyer's stats and wondered why I had it out for him, and then I had to explain the method to Cuddyer's madness. It was the same with Torii Hunter when he played here (though Hunter was a much more beloved player, something I'll never understand. The guy never had a clutch hit in his entire career, but he made great defensive plays. I just goes to show you that it's not the long ball that the chicks dig but the defensive plays -- Carlos Gomez is a horrendous offensive player but people are fans of him because he can make a diving catch. People like Hunter and Gomez can consistently wilt in the clutch at the plate but because they can cover some ground in the outfield, they've got in made in the shade, complete with a mega-million-dollar contract). Cuddyer's production is based mainly on tacking on meaningless runs in blowout wins or by hitting homeruns when the team is down by a ton. The two best games for Cuddyer were back-to-back games in late May, when he had four hits in two straight games, one of which was a cycle. The Twins won those games 20-1 and 11-3. Nine of Cuddyer's 14 home runs are of the solo variety, and not many of his home runs have really factored in a game (I'd say two or three). Yeah, he might have "good" numbers at the end of the season, but can anyone remember a clutch hit that this guy's ever had? By clutch I mean a two-out hit that either ties the game or puts the team ahead late in the ballgame (seventh inning and later). I'll be delighted to hear from anyone who can remember such an instance.Now the Scaredy Cats have to face A.J. Burnett, who's been pitching very well as of late for the Bombers. Burnett's one of those guys that can be simply overpowering at times, and we all know what the Twins like to do against those guys (namely, nothing). Soft-tosser Glen Perkins goes for the Twins -- the last time Perkins faced New York, he didn't make it out of the first inning, and he had to go on the disabled list with suckitis after the game it was so bad.
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